So...A Text

Today I received a text out of the blue from my Sister In-Law.
And it totally made my day.

Coming from her, what she said was one of the best compliments I've ever received.
And she had no idea how much I needed to hear something like that!
What she said made me feel really good.

I'm not really sure what made her send the text.
I think it had something to do with this and mostly to do with the pain meds she's on.
And even though she probably won't remember she sent me that text, I'll take it! :)

Today I am thankful for small acts of kindness that can make a world of a difference.



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So...The Lord's Hand

Today I am thankful for the Lord's hand in my daily life.

I was given some very wise counsel from our bishop last night. He referred me to this talk given by Elder Eyring a few years ago, about journalling. He encouraged me to look for the Lord's hand in my life every day and to record it in my journal.

I know that this will be a huge blessing in my life.
Even just last night, after my conversation with the bishop, I opened my journal and started recording my observations of blessings throughout the day.

The Lord blesses me daily.
Sometimes in big ways, and sometimes in very small ways.

I am thankful that He does and thankful to be reminded to look for His hand every day.



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So...Park & Rec

Today I am thankful for Park & Rec programs.

Our kiddos have been involved in soccer, swimming, and gymnastics through our city's Park & Rec. and they have loved every class they've gone to! Last night we finished up our first ever gymnastics session. Both girls loved the class, and Third Daughter loved running around the gym while we waited.

I am thankful to live in a place that is so family oriented and full of activities for kids, at an affordable price!

I love watching the Daughters get excited about the new things they get to do and learn. I love watching their confidence grow as they are involved in their "own" things.

And I am so thankful that there are many opportunities available to them to develop new skills, talents, and hobbies.

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So...Challenges

Today I am thankful for challenges.
Or at least I'm trying to be. :)

I really do know that life's challenges serve a purpose, more than just making life feel hard. Challenges and trials are a chance for me to learn and grow, and to help me reach my potential.

I am thankful for experiences in my life that help me turn to the Lord.

Though my trials are pretty small (which is another thing I'm thankful for) they still can be challenging, and sometimes exhausting.

I am thankful for the things that I learn through my challenges - and hope someday to get a little better at handling them. :)



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So...Scriptures

Today I am thankful for the scriptures.



There are so many things to be grateful for.
With little effort, I can compile a list of things that I am deeply grateful for: my family, my friends, my home, my faith, my health, etc. Life is full of so many blessings that I am grateful for on a daily basis.

But even with so many things to be grateful for, life sometimes just feels challenging.
At least it does to me.

Sometimes the things that I do everyday - sometimes the same things I am grateful for - just seem to be challenging. Sometimes for no reason at all.

I think that is part of the plan.
In fact, I know it is.
We are meant to be challenged in this life.
We are meant to face trials, large and small.
We are meant to draw closer to the Lord, and closer to the Savior as we face these challenges.
This is an important part of our life.
An important way for us to learn and grow in faith.
It is during the challenging times that I have felt closer to my Savior and felt His love in my life stronger than other times.

Because this is part of the plan, and because Heavenly Father is a loving father, He has given us tools and blessings to help us progress, overcome challenges, and feel peace and love during difficult times. One of the greatest tools He has given us is the scriptures.

I have always valued the scriptures as a source of truth, peace, and answers. I have always been aware of the power the scriptures can bring into my life. I have always felt peace as I've read from their pages, even if I didn't quite understand the words I was reading. But as I grow up, and as I face more of life's challenges, I am developing an even deeper love and gratitude for the scriptures.

Every time I have turned to the scriptures for an answer, or guidance, or comfort, I have found it. I can feel the Lord communicating to me through the power of the Holy Ghost when I read the words found in the scriptures.

I have heard before "prayer is the way we can talk to God, and the scriptures is the way God can talk to us." I have felt that to be true as some of my most secret prayers have been answered as I read from the scriptures. These words, after all, are words given straight from Heavenly Father Himself.

I absolutely believe that the Lord speaks to us through His prophets.
He always has.
He still does today.

Elder Scott gave an amazing talk in General Conference on this exact topic. He described the scriptures as becoming a friend to us as we learn, ponder, search, and memorize verses. I love this analogy! Makes my relationship with the scriptures feel more personal, more intimate.

As I have mentioned before, friends have been an important source of strength and comfort to me as I have faced life's challenges. Under this definition, I would absolutely include the scriptures among my friends. They have been an important, and invaluable source of strength and comfort to me through difficult times. And they are always there for me. No matter what.

Just this last week, as I was reading in Isaiah (out of all places) I found comfort in:

"I, even I, am he that comforteth you: who art thou, that thou shouldst be afraid of a man that shall die, and the son of man which shall be made of grass;"

-Isaiah 51:12

and

"Thy sun shall no more go down; neither shall thy moon withdraw itself: for the Lord shall be unto thee an everlasting light , and thy God thy glory."

-Isaiah 60:20

"The scriptures can form a foundation of support. They can provide an icredibly large resource of willing friends who can help us....Scriptures can calm an agitated soul, giving peace, hope, and a restoration of confidence in one's ability to oversome the challenges of life. They have potent power to heal emotional challenges when there is faith in the Savior." -Elder Richard G. Scott

Have you read the rest of his talk from General Conference?
Oh...if you haven't, you should.
It's a good one.

So today, and every day, I am incredibly thankful for the scriptures.
I am thankful for the closeness I feel to the Lord when I read His words.
I am thankful for the love that I feel, from Him, as I find answers to my prayers in the pages of the scriptures.

To me, this is one of the most precious blessings - to feel His love.

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So...First Daughter

Today I am thankful for First Daughter.



photo taken by Andrea
This morning First Daughter and I went on a much needed daughter date.
We got all dolled up and headed out to one of our favorite parks for a photo shoot with one of our favorite cousins (and talented photographer) Andrea.

I've been dreaming about photos with each of the daughters.
Perhaps it is motivated by a realization that my one-on-one time with them is limited and will only become more so when Baby Brother arrives.
I want time dedicated to each one of them, and proof that it happened.

I want each of them to know that I love them. That I love spending time with just them.
I want each of them to have time with me all to themselves. That doesn't happen very often around here. And I want them to have pictures to remember being just with mom.

And, I admit, I reap most of the benefit by getting time with each one of them to myself.

This morning it was First Daughter.
She felt special as we shared a closet picking out the perfect coordinating outfits together and posing in front of the mirror.
She gave me advice on whether to go for the black or brown boots.
She watched me blow dry my hair and I helped curl hers.
She watched me put on my makeup while I shared my "wisdom" on natural beauty.
I curled her eyelashes and let her put on some lip gloss.
She had an extra bounce in her step and we walked out the front door and climbed in the car.

She felt a little funny having someone take pictures of us walking along a path, smiling at each other, and sharing some laughs. She tried her best to act natural, but admitted it felt a bit strange. It was obvious that she loved it though as she kept mentioning how much fun she was having being just with mom. I told her I loved it too. It reminded me of when it was just the two of us, all the time.

After the photo shoot we headed over to Magleby's Fresh for some all-you-can eat french toast and hot chocolate with whipped cream. First Daughter cleaned her plate and practically licked the buttermilk syrup container clean. I did too. :)

We talked over breakfast about how it can be hard to be a big sister and how it can be hard to be a mom too. We talked about Heavenly Father's plan for us and how He puts us just where we need to be in a family, even if it's hard. I assured her that Heavenly Father knows how amazing she is, and how much she can teach her little sisters and me.

It is such a gift to have First Daughter in my life. She teaches me and amazes me everyday. We both are learning how to best fulfill our roles in our family, but we both are trying our bests and trying to work together. I hope we can always talk like we did today, and support each other in our efforts.

She has been blessed with a maturity beyond her years. She can understand the importance of the things we talked about and I see her internalizing it. I see her efforts everyday to be a little better, be helpful, be kind, and trying to communicate with her family. These are things that, to me, seem beyond the duties of a six-year-old girl. Yet she does it, and she does it well.

It is a blessing to have her as my first, and at the same time an overwhelming challenge.
Being a mother has exposed all of my weaknesses and magnified them.
I want to be better than I am - for her - because most days I'm not so sure I know what I'm doing.

But I am thankful that she is patient with me, she forgives me, and that she loves me.
Because she is oh so precious to me and I love her oh so much.

And I can't wait to see how today's pictures turn out.
Thank you Andrea!


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So...11.11.11

Today I am thankful for all the men + women that have fought for our country.
May God always bless them and their families.



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So...Is There An Echo In Here?

Today I am thankful for friends, and how patient they are with me.

Wait, what?
I've already said that???

Well it's true.

Yesterday alone, I had three different friends lend a listening ear, and a shoulder to cry on without hesitation. As soon as I asked, they were there and willing.

You see, I've been struggling a bit lately. Pregnancy very easily can get the best of me, and this pregnancy has been no exception to the rule. Hormones and I don't get along very well. And it is a struggle.

And you know, sometime life just feels hard.
Sometimes for no reason at all.

Today I am thankful for great friends that I can turn to.
Friends that understand how I feel before I even really say anything.
Friends that don't judge me or blame me for struggling.
Friends that let me cry, and cry, and cry some more.
And guess what? They still are my friends when I'm done crying!

I have needed some womanly, motherly, emotional support the past couple days, and I am so thankful for wonderful friends. Again.



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So...Thankful Today

Today I am thankful there are other moms that share the same strong feelings that I have.

There are few things that I feel very strongly about when it comes to parenting.
Ok, that kind of came out wrong.
I feel very strongly about parenting and take the responsibility very seriously, but I am very aware that there are lots of ways to do things and I try to keep a pretty open mind. I think I do a pretty good job at this.

I try not to control everything and to let my kids learn through experience when possible and appropriate. I also try to let my kids be their own selves and try to be flexible to their needs. I think I do a pretty good job at this too.

There are very few things that I feel strongly enough about that I am not very flexible.
In fact, these very few things can make me extremely protective, and pretty worked up.

One of these things is my kids' modesty and privacy.

My Sister In law touched on some of these things on her blog yesterday.
It was like she was reading my mind, or over-hearing some of my recent conversations on the topic.

We have pretty clear guidelines on situations that are and are not appropriate when it comes to privacy and modesty. Some are common sense. Some are not so common.
I'm sure that more guidelines will come up as the need presents itself and I anticipate guidelines changing a bit as the girls grow up.

My concern is not only on their safety - although that is a huge concern.
I want to do all that I can to protect them. I want to teach them how to protect themselves and how to say "no" or "stop" or "I don't feel comfortable."

But I also feel strongly about building a foundation for them to live chaste, virtuous lives.
I don't want them to feel completely comfortable being naked around others or in situations that seem without consequence (i.e. "no one will no what we do behind this closed door"). I want them to see and treat their bodies sacredly, and reverently. I want them to be private and modest young women.

And so we teach them now. This foundation, in a way is an attempt to protect them and prepare them for the challenges and temptations that lay ahead. I try not to be too over-the-top controlling about the issue, because I'm aware that sometimes that can backfire.

We don't talk about being naked as something bad, or something we don't talk about. I don't teach them to be ashamed of their bodies or embarrassed by them. But we talk about keeping our bodies private and modest quite frequently. Even at home. Even around our family. And of course, we talk about the dangers of strangers.

I know that I cannot control everything that happens in my kiddos lives.
I know that I'm not meant to.
I know that I cannot always be there (and I actually know I'm not meant be).
I know that there will be good and bad choices made, by my kids and by others.
I know that things will not go exactly the way I want them to.
All I can do is do my best to teach my kiddos why these things are important, how they can best protect themselves, and set some ground rules for them to live by.
For their sakes - not just so Mom doesn't get mad.
And I hope and pray that something horrible doesn't happen to them.

I have to do my best to teach them, and then trust that things will be ok.

And I know that there are sometimes exceptions to the rules. But in my opinion, it is too much to ask a 2, 4, and 6 year old to be capable of making those judgement calls as to when an exception applies.

For instance, when is it ok to be naked with someone? Is it ok because we're in the bath? Is it ok because we're both girls? Because we're both kids? Is it ok because an adult told me it is ok? How well do I need to know them? How good of a friend do they need to be? Is it ok because I've known them my whole life or because I see them everyday? Or just because I'm related to them does it make it ok, even though this is the first time I'm meeting them or because I see them a couple times a year?

It can be confusing when things are allowed sometimes and not other times. And if I'm not always going to be there to tell them yes this is appropriate or no this is not, the rules are the rules. Always. In this case - we do not take baths with friends (or cousins) and we always keep our clothes on (even for dress up). Especially when Mom or Dad isn't there. We try our best to stick to our rules no matter what.

This is a tricky thing, because like most parenting issues everyone has their own ideas about what is appropriate and what is not. I don't expect everyone to feel the same way that I do. I don't even expect everyone to understand why I feel the way I do and why these things are so important to me. I am very sensitive to that. And in no way to I feel I need to share a list with everyone my kids come in contact with about things I do and don't approve of.

It's something I struggle with. It's hard for me to take a stand for the things I feel strongly about. Not hard for me to do, but hard for me to handle emotionally. I worry about making people feel like I judge the way they parent or that I'm trying to push my thoughts and feelings onto them. Because I'm not. I'm just trying to protect my kids and do what I feel is important for us. And that does not mean that I think they do not have the same intentions with their kids if they do not do things the same way as I do.

And because I also feel strongly about the importance of my children having experiences without me, I leave them in situations in the care of others, and hope and pray that their best interest is being considered and they are being protected. It is important to me that my kids know that there are people they can trust in this world besides Mom & Dad.

It is hard holding your ground as a mother.
It is hard when you feel very strongly to do things a certain way that not everyone else does.
It is hard saying no to your kid when other kids are allowed to do that same thing.
It is hard to explain why your answer is still no. No matter what.

But that's part of being a mom.
Arguably one of the most important parts.

I explain to my kiddos that my job as their mom is to love, teach, prepare, and protect them.
I explain that I say no sometimes because I love them and I am doing what I (and their dad) feel will accomplish one or more of my four main responsibilities.
I explain, and I pray that they understand.

So, today I am thankful to know that there is another mom out there that feels as strongly as I do about these things. It can be difficult in situations when other moms allow or even encourage some of the behaviors or situations I don't feel comfortable with, and I have to be the mean old mom that says no. I struggle with confidence as a mom and feeling comfortable saying "We do it this way, just because we feel like it's what we need to do."

I'm thankful that I feel supported in my efforts.
I'm thankful to know that it's ok that I feel like this is important.
I'm thankful to know that I'm not alone.



Wow...apparently I had a lot to say on the subject.
I guess I'm thankful also to finally get it all out!



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So...A Gift

Today I am thankful for an uninterrupted night of sleep.

When I was a new mom, I remember expressing to a friend (and experienced mom) how unprepared I felt for the lack of sleep that came along with a new baby. She laughed a little and assured me that I would be tired for the rest of my life.

Even though my kids have all been good sleepers and have slept through the night at a young age, it is rare that we make it through a night completely uninterrupted.

Someone will have to go potty.
Someone will have a nightmare.
Someone might have an accident.
Someone will lose their blankie.
Someone will need to be tucked in again.
Someone will try to sneak into our bed.
Someone will want cuddles.
Someone will need a drink.
Someone may sneak in just to kiss me on the cheek :)

I don't mean to be complaining. It actually doesn't bother me - it's just one of the parts of being a mom. Now, when there are three someones waking up multiple times a night for any or all of the above, that bothers me.

This morning I woke up and I didn't feel tired. That hardly ever happens. Especially when I'm pregnant.

I quickly realized the reason for my restfulness was that not one little body had woken up last night. I asked Husband if we had actually had an uninterrupted night of sleep (sometimes I don't wake up when they come in). He confirmed. I was astounded.

What a gift!

This pregnant mama is so thankful that her little kiddos gave her a little extra sleep and rest to get through another day of "climbing a mountain."



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So...Playmates

Today I am thankful that my sweet daughters are the best playmates.

I've been dragging lately, as my belly grows and my energy level shrinks.
I am so thankful that these girlies play so well together and that they forgive their mother for being busy making a baby.









Right now I can hear the muffled sounds of First and Second Daughter playing "Christmas morning" upstairs in the guest bedroom (in a British accent) and it makes my heart happy. They have no idea how much of a gift it is to their mother that they are great playmates.

And have I mentioned how incredibly patient my children are with me?
Well, they are.

One of the hardest part of pregnancy for me is not feeling on top of my game - or anywhere close - as a mother. I feel so sad for my kids when I feel so incapable. But thankfully, my kids are patient with me, they still love me, and in fact they understand and forgive me.

Second Daughter said to me just the other day, as I'm laying helplessly on the couch - "It's ok Mom. You just rest and take care of that baby."

First Daughter, just days before that, woke up with her little sisters, took them downstairs and poured them all cereal and milk, turned on the TV for them, and did her best to keep them out of our bedroom so Husband + I could sleep in. She later told me she just wanted to let us relax.

Third Daughter, last night, snuck into my bedroom just to give me a kiss on the cheek while I slept (or so she thought) and then climbed back into her bed without one word.

Besides being the best of playmates, these kiddos just simply are the best.

(stay tuned for more thankful posts starring the Daughters.)

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So...My Siblings

Today I am thankful for my brothers and sister.


my wedding, October 2003
Sadly, this is the most recent picture I have of us all together. It was taken eight years ago.

My siblings have become my best friends, and most favorite people in the world. I love being around every single one of them. They are the ones who I feel like I can be 100% myself. 100% of the time. They always can make me laugh hard. And I like that they laugh at my jokes. They make me feel like I'm still funny and still pretty cool.

I love the memories and the bond we have. They are just the coolest people.
It's hard living so far away from most of them. Everytime I'm with each of them I feel like I need more of them in my life. I wish it was easier to get together. I love my siblings.

Since Little Brother has returned home from his mission, he has been out here attending BYU. I am loving this. I get to hang out with him at least once a week. I'm so glad that he likes to hang out with me. Though he was an annoying little brother for many of our growing up years, he has become one of my best friends. I love that he is a part of my girls lives.

Today I am thankful for my brothers and sister.
They are a huge blessing in my life, and four of the most important people to me.
I'm thankful for their love, support, and friendship.




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So...My Friends

Today I am thankful for friends.
Well, everyday I'm thankful for friends.

I didn't realize how important friends were until I became a wife and mother. I've always been the independent type - don't really like to lean on others for support. I've always liked for things I did to be my own idea, or my own accomplishment. I've always liked to do my own thing in my own way and not have to check in with anyone. I've always preferred to be a leader, not a follower.

Growing up is humbling me.

I've discovered that no matter how I like things to be, no matter how independent I want to be (or think I am) I need others. I need support. I need help. I need to not feel alone. I need to feel understood, to feel appreciated, to feel important. I need friends. Close friends.

It wasn't until I became a mother that I realized how much I needed friends. I mean, I always had friends, but I never quite felt like I needed them, or needed to be close with them. When I became a mother, I found myself needing women in my life that I could relate to. Women that I could talk to about things that were meaningful to me and to them. Friends that I could depend on. Friends that could help uplift me. Women that understood the emotions I was struggling with and could support me through difficult times. Women that could show me unconditional love and patience. And that I could do the same for them.

Being a grown up is hard. Becoming a wife and a mother at such a young age, I had to grow up very quickly. There have been lots of things I have learned in the process - about myself, about others, and about life - and there are struggles I have faced along the way. Having good friends has made such a huge impact on who I've become and who I'm striving to be. I learn so much from the wonderful women in my life that I am blessed to call my friends.

And I truly believe that the Lord answers our prayers, and shows us His love, through the people that are in our lives. Especially our friends.

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So...My Body

Today I am thankful for my body.

Even though I don't always feel like it as of late - with all the growing, and stretching, and squishing, and aching - it is true. I am thankful for my body and all that it can do.

From growing a baby...

...to running a half marathon...


...to healing itself, and everything else.
My body is a gift, and I am thankful for it.

p.s. I am 29 weeks pregnant with a baby BOY!




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So...Our Home

Today I am thankful for our home.

Last March we moved literally around the corner into a new (to us) home. This house provides us with more space, more room to grow, and thus more time living in this neighborhood that we love oh so very much.

The circumstances (on our end of the deal) around us ending up in this house was nothing short of miraculous. Even in the middle of a recession and a horrible housing market, everything fell perfectly into place for us to sell our previous house and purchase our new one without any glitches. The fact that we never had a month with a double mortgage payment was a miracle in of itself, among many.

Some many blessings fell into our laps surrounding this move. It was a risk, moving during such economic uncertainty and being upside-down in our previous mortgage, but we approached the decision prayerfully, trusting that things would work out the way they were meant to. And as we watched every roadblock we encountered (and there were lots - along with all the hoops we had to jump through with the banks) pass us by, our prayers for guidance were turned to prayers of thanksgiving as it becamse clear that this move was in fact the right thing for us to do, and that the Lord had provided a way.

Our home is perfect for us.

After six months of settling in, it feels very much like home.

And as heartbreaking as it was for me to leave our other home - the home full of so many of our memories; the home we brought two babies home to; the home we lived in during such precious years of our family's life - I see a whole future of family memories here before us. I can picture my babies as teenagers sitting at this new counter doing their homework or chatting with me while I cook. And that makes me happy.

I know we have many wonderful years ahead of us here in this home, and I am so thankful.

I am thankful to have a beautiful home in which we can raise our beautiful family.

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So...I'm Thankful

Today I am thankful for patience.

Patience is a virtue I am constantly trying to acquire. I'm never quite sure if I get it. It seems the more patience I exercise, the farther my patience is tested and pushed just barely out of my reach. It often feels right at my fingertips, but just far enough away that I can't quite grasp it.

The idea, I think, is that as it is challenged it will be stretched and therefore it will grow. I hope this is happening. I pray everyday for more patience than the day before, more patience than I feel I have, and more patience that my family deserves. I go forward with faith, believing and hoping that my little successes can be magnified through my efforts and desire to be better.

But that's not the patience I am thankful for.

I am thankful for the patience of others.

I am not perfect.
In fact, I'm no where close.
I make mistakes all the time. One's I really wish I didn't make.
I say stupid things.
I hurt people's feelings.
I yell at my kids.
I don't do things I know I'm supposed to do.
I don't do things I know I want to do.
I can be thoughtless.
I can be careless.
I can be selfish.
I get frustrated with others.
I can get pretty down on myself.
I complain.
Sometimes I even whine.

And I very easily can get frustrated with myself and all of these things that I do that I wish I didn't. I get frustrated that I can recognize these things that I do that I don't want to be doing - or the things that I'm not doing that I want to be doing. I get frustrated and discouraged that I'm not succeeding at changing, or that I can't see my progress.
I don't have very much patience with myself.
(And if you don't either, read this talk - it's so very good.)

But I am incredibly thankful for the patience that others have with me. I am thankful for their forgiveness and unconditional love.

Patience, I believe, is one of the most genuine forms of love.

I am thankful that they can look past my flaws, mistakes, and weaknesses (even when I can't) and still be my friend. I am thankful for their example. It is so helpful and motivating to have inspiring examples of patient people in my life.

Husband is the ultimate example to me - of so many things, but especially patience.
He is patient with me, through my mistakes and weaknesses, but also through my struggle to be patient with myself. He hears my complaints, my discouragements, my frustrations, my struggles, my sadness, and listens very patiently. Repeatedly. He doesn't get frustrated with me. He listens and tries to help, even though I know he doesn't relate to the same feelings I struggle with. He loves me, and I feel his love for me all the time. Unconditionally. To say that I am thankful for his patience is an understatement.

And I am incredibly thankful (though this merits it's own thankful post) for the fact that through the love and patience of the Savior, I can try again each day to be a little better. Through and because of Him, my weaknesses can become my strengths.
I truly believe that.
And for that I am thankful.



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