So Buttons

So...A Text

2011-11-17T13:59:00.000-08:00

Today I received a text out of the blue from my Sister In-Law.
And it totally made my day.

Coming from her, what she said was one of the best compliments I've ever received.
And she had no idea how much I needed to hear something like that!
What she said made me feel really good.

I'm not really sure what made her send the text.
I think it had something to do with this and mostly to do with the pain meds she's on.
And even though she probably won't remember she sent me that text, I'll take it! :)

Today I am thankful for small acts of kindness that can make a world of a difference.

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So...The Lord's Hand

2011-11-16T11:25:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for the Lord's hand in my daily life.

I was given some very wise counsel from our bishop last night. He referred me to this talk given by Elder Eyring a few years ago, about journalling. He encouraged me to look for the Lord's hand in my life every day and to record it in my journal.

I know that this will be a huge blessing in my life.
Even just last night, after my conversation with the bishop, I opened my journal and started recording my observations of blessings throughout the day.

The Lord blesses me daily.
Sometimes in big ways, and sometimes in very small ways.

I am thankful that He does and thankful to be reminded to look for His hand every day.

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So...Park & Rec

2011-11-15T18:16:00.001-08:00

Today I am thankful for Park & Rec programs.

Our kiddos have been involved in soccer, swimming, and gymnastics through our city's Park & Rec. and they have loved every class they've gone to! Last night we finished up our first ever gymnastics session. Both girls loved the class, and Third Daughter loved running around the gym while we waited.

I am thankful to live in a place that is so family oriented and full of activities for kids, at an affordable price!

I love watching the Daughters get excited about the new things they get to do and learn. I love watching their confidence grow as they are involved in their "own" things.

And I am so thankful that there are many opportunities available to them to develop new skills, talents, and hobbies.

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So...Challenges

2011-11-14T09:17:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for challenges.
Or at least I'm trying to be. :)

I really do know that life's challenges serve a purpose, more than just making life feel hard. Challenges and trials are a chance for me to learn and grow, and to help me reach my potential.

I am thankful for experiences in my life that help me turn to the Lord.

Though my trials are pretty small (which is another thing I'm thankful for) they still can be challenging, and sometimes exhausting.

I am thankful for the things that I learn through my challenges - and hope someday to get a little better at handling them. :)

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So...Scriptures

2011-11-13T12:00:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for the scriptures.

There are so many things to be grateful for.
With little effort, I can compile a list of things that I am deeply grateful for: my family, my friends, my home, my faith, my health, etc. Life is full of so many blessings that I am grateful for on a daily basis.

But even with so many things to be grateful for, life sometimes just feels challenging.
At least it does to me.

Sometimes the things that I do everyday - sometimes the same things I am grateful for - just seem to be challenging. Sometimes for no reason at all.

I think that is part of the plan.
In fact, I know it is.
We are meant to be challenged in this life.
We are meant to face trials, large and small.
We are meant to draw closer to the Lord, and closer to the Savior as we face these challenges.
This is an important part of our life.
An important way for us to learn and grow in faith.
It is during the challenging times that I have felt closer to my Savior and felt His love in my life stronger than other times.

Because this is part of the plan, and because Heavenly Father is a loving father, He has given us tools and blessings to help us progress, overcome challenges, and feel peace and love during difficult times. One of the greatest tools He has given us is the scriptures.

I have always valued the scriptures as a source of truth, peace, and answers. I have always been aware of the power the scriptures can bring into my life. I have always felt peace as I've read from their pages, even if I didn't quite understand the words I was reading. But as I grow up, and as I face more of life's challenges, I am developing an even deeper love and gratitude for the scriptures.

Every time I have turned to the scriptures for an answer, or guidance, or comfort, I have found it. I can feel the Lord communicating to me through the power of the Holy Ghost when I read the words found in the scriptures.

I have heard before "prayer is the way we can talk to God, and the scriptures is the way God can talk to us." I have felt that to be true as some of my most secret prayers have been answered as I read from the scriptures. These words, after all, are words given straight from Heavenly Father Himself.

I absolutely believe that the Lord speaks to us through His prophets.
He always has.
He still does today.

Elder Scott gave an amazing talk in General Conference on this exact topic. He described the scriptures as becoming a friend to us as we learn, ponder, search, and memorize verses. I love this analogy! Makes my relationship with the scriptures feel more personal, more intimate.

As I have mentioned before, friends have been an important source of strength and comfort to me as I have faced life's challenges. Under this definition, I would absolutely include the scriptures among my friends. They have been an important, and invaluable source of strength and comfort to me through difficult times. And they are always there for me. No matter what.

Just this last week, as I was reading in Isaiah (out of all places) I found comfort in:

"I, even I, am he that comforteth you: who art thou, that thou shouldst be afraid of a man that shall die, and the son of man which shall be made of grass;"

-Isaiah 51:12

and

"Thy sun shall no more go down; neither shall thy moon withdraw itself: for the Lord shall be unto thee an everlasting light , and thy God thy glory."

-Isaiah 60:20

"The scriptures can form a foundation of support. They can provide an icredibly large resource of willing friends who can help us....Scriptures can calm an agitated soul, giving peace, hope, and a restoration of confidence in one's ability to oversome the challenges of life. They have potent power to heal emotional challenges when there is faith in the Savior." -Elder Richard G. Scott

Have you read the rest of his talk from General Conference?
Oh...if you haven't, you should.
It's a good one.

So today, and every day, I am incredibly thankful for the scriptures.
I am thankful for the closeness I feel to the Lord when I read His words.
I am thankful for the love that I feel, from Him, as I find answers to my prayers in the pages of the scriptures.

To me, this is one of the most precious blessings - to feel His love.

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So...First Daughter

2011-11-12T14:36:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for First Daughter.

photo taken by Andrea
This morning First Daughter and I went on a much needed daughter date.
We got all dolled up and headed out to one of our favorite parks for a photo shoot with one of our favorite cousins (and talented photographer) Andrea.

I've been dreaming about photos with each of the daughters.
Perhaps it is motivated by a realization that my one-on-one time with them is limited and will only become more so when Baby Brother arrives.
I want time dedicated to each one of them, and proof that it happened.

I want each of them to know that I love them. That I love spending time with just them.
I want each of them to have time with me all to themselves. That doesn't happen very often around here. And I want them to have pictures to remember being just with mom.

And, I admit, I reap most of the benefit by getting time with each one of them to myself.

This morning it was First Daughter.
She felt special as we shared a closet picking out the perfect coordinating outfits together and posing in front of the mirror.
She gave me advice on whether to go for the black or brown boots.
She watched me blow dry my hair and I helped curl hers.
She watched me put on my makeup while I shared my "wisdom" on natural beauty.
I curled her eyelashes and let her put on some lip gloss.
She had an extra bounce in her step and we walked out the front door and climbed in the car.

She felt a little funny having someone take pictures of us walking along a path, smiling at each other, and sharing some laughs. She tried her best to act natural, but admitted it felt a bit strange. It was obvious that she loved it though as she kept mentioning how much fun she was having being just with mom. I told her I loved it too. It reminded me of when it was just the two of us, all the time.

After the photo shoot we headed over to Magleby's Fresh for some all-you-can eat french toast and hot chocolate with whipped cream. First Daughter cleaned her plate and practically licked the buttermilk syrup container clean. I did too. :)

We talked over breakfast about how it can be hard to be a big sister and how it can be hard to be a mom too. We talked about Heavenly Father's plan for us and how He puts us just where we need to be in a family, even if it's hard. I assured her that Heavenly Father knows how amazing she is, and how much she can teach her little sisters and me.

It is such a gift to have First Daughter in my life. She teaches me and amazes me everyday. We both are learning how to best fulfill our roles in our family, but we both are trying our bests and trying to work together. I hope we can always talk like we did today, and support each other in our efforts.

She has been blessed with a maturity beyond her years. She can understand the importance of the things we talked about and I see her internalizing it. I see her efforts everyday to be a little better, be helpful, be kind, and trying to communicate with her family. These are things that, to me, seem beyond the duties of a six-year-old girl. Yet she does it, and she does it well.

It is a blessing to have her as my first, and at the same time an overwhelming challenge.
Being a mother has exposed all of my weaknesses and magnified them.
I want to be better than I am - for her - because most days I'm not so sure I know what I'm doing.

But I am thankful that she is patient with me, she forgives me, and that she loves me.
Because she is oh so precious to me and I love her oh so much.

And I can't wait to see how today's pictures turn out.
Thank you Andrea!

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So...11.11.11

2011-11-11T06:59:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for all the men + women that have fought for our country.
May God always bless them and their families.

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So...Is There An Echo In Here?

2011-11-10T06:46:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for friends, and how patient they are with me.

Wait, what?
I've already said that???

Well it's true.

Yesterday alone, I had three different friends lend a listening ear, and a shoulder to cry on without hesitation. As soon as I asked, they were there and willing.

You see, I've been struggling a bit lately. Pregnancy very easily can get the best of me, and this pregnancy has been no exception to the rule. Hormones and I don't get along very well. And it is a struggle.

And you know, sometime life just feels hard.
Sometimes for no reason at all.

Today I am thankful for great friends that I can turn to.
Friends that understand how I feel before I even really say anything.
Friends that don't judge me or blame me for struggling.
Friends that let me cry, and cry, and cry some more.
And guess what? They still are my friends when I'm done crying!

I have needed some womanly, motherly, emotional support the past couple days, and I am so thankful for wonderful friends. Again.

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So...Thankful Today

2011-11-09T08:09:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful there are other moms that share the same strong feelings that I have.

There are few things that I feel very strongly about when it comes to parenting.
Ok, that kind of came out wrong.
I feel very strongly about parenting and take the responsibility very seriously, but I am very aware that there are lots of ways to do things and I try to keep a pretty open mind. I think I do a pretty good job at this.

I try not to control everything and to let my kids learn through experience when possible and appropriate. I also try to let my kids be their own selves and try to be flexible to their needs. I think I do a pretty good job at this too.

There are very few things that I feel strongly enough about that I am not very flexible.
In fact, these very few things can make me extremely protective, and pretty worked up.

One of these things is my kids' modesty and privacy.

My Sister In law touched on some of these things on her blog yesterday.
It was like she was reading my mind, or over-hearing some of my recent conversations on the topic.

We have pretty clear guidelines on situations that are and are not appropriate when it comes to privacy and modesty. Some are common sense. Some are not so common.
I'm sure that more guidelines will come up as the need presents itself and I anticipate guidelines changing a bit as the girls grow up.

My concern is not only on their safety - although that is a huge concern.
I want to do all that I can to protect them. I want to teach them how to protect themselves and how to say "no" or "stop" or "I don't feel comfortable."

But I also feel strongly about building a foundation for them to live chaste, virtuous lives.
I don't want them to feel completely comfortable being naked around others or in situations that seem without consequence (i.e. "no one will no what we do behind this closed door"). I want them to see and treat their bodies sacredly, and reverently. I want them to be private and modest young women.

And so we teach them now. This foundation, in a way is an attempt to protect them and prepare them for the challenges and temptations that lay ahead. I try not to be too over-the-top controlling about the issue, because I'm aware that sometimes that can backfire.

We don't talk about being naked as something bad, or something we don't talk about. I don't teach them to be ashamed of their bodies or embarrassed by them. But we talk about keeping our bodies private and modest quite frequently. Even at home. Even around our family. And of course, we talk about the dangers of strangers.

I know that I cannot control everything that happens in my kiddos lives.
I know that I'm not meant to.
I know that I cannot always be there (and I actually know I'm not meant be).
I know that there will be good and bad choices made, by my kids and by others.
I know that things will not go exactly the way I want them to.
All I can do is do my best to teach my kiddos why these things are important, how they can best protect themselves, and set some ground rules for them to live by.
For their sakes - not just so Mom doesn't get mad.
And I hope and pray that something horrible doesn't happen to them.

I have to do my best to teach them, and then trust that things will be ok.

And I know that there are sometimes exceptions to the rules. But in my opinion, it is too much to ask a 2, 4, and 6 year old to be capable of making those judgement calls as to when an exception applies.

For instance, when is it ok to be naked with someone? Is it ok because we're in the bath? Is it ok because we're both girls? Because we're both kids? Is it ok because an adult told me it is ok? How well do I need to know them? How good of a friend do they need to be? Is it ok because I've known them my whole life or because I see them everyday? Or just because I'm related to them does it make it ok, even though this is the first time I'm meeting them or because I see them a couple times a year?

It can be confusing when things are allowed sometimes and not other times. And if I'm not always going to be there to tell them yes this is appropriate or no this is not, the rules are the rules. Always. In this case - we do not take baths with friends (or cousins) and we always keep our clothes on (even for dress up). Especially when Mom or Dad isn't there. We try our best to stick to our rules no matter what.

This is a tricky thing, because like most parenting issues everyone has their own ideas about what is appropriate and what is not. I don't expect everyone to feel the same way that I do. I don't even expect everyone to understand why I feel the way I do and why these things are so important to me. I am very sensitive to that. And in no way to I feel I need to share a list with everyone my kids come in contact with about things I do and don't approve of.

It's something I struggle with. It's hard for me to take a stand for the things I feel strongly about. Not hard for me to do, but hard for me to handle emotionally. I worry about making people feel like I judge the way they parent or that I'm trying to push my thoughts and feelings onto them. Because I'm not. I'm just trying to protect my kids and do what I feel is important for us. And that does not mean that I think they do not have the same intentions with their kids if they do not do things the same way as I do.

And because I also feel strongly about the importance of my children having experiences without me, I leave them in situations in the care of others, and hope and pray that their best interest is being considered and they are being protected. It is important to me that my kids know that there are people they can trust in this world besides Mom & Dad.

It is hard holding your ground as a mother.
It is hard when you feel very strongly to do things a certain way that not everyone else does.
It is hard saying no to your kid when other kids are allowed to do that same thing.
It is hard to explain why your answer is still no. No matter what.

But that's part of being a mom.
Arguably one of the most important parts.

I explain to my kiddos that my job as their mom is to love, teach, prepare, and protect them.
I explain that I say no sometimes because I love them and I am doing what I (and their dad) feel will accomplish one or more of my four main responsibilities.
I explain, and I pray that they understand.

So, today I am thankful to know that there is another mom out there that feels as strongly as I do about these things. It can be difficult in situations when other moms allow or even encourage some of the behaviors or situations I don't feel comfortable with, and I have to be the mean old mom that says no. I struggle with confidence as a mom and feeling comfortable saying "We do it this way, just because we feel like it's what we need to do."

I'm thankful that I feel supported in my efforts.
I'm thankful to know that it's ok that I feel like this is important.
I'm thankful to know that I'm not alone.

Wow...apparently I had a lot to say on the subject.
I guess I'm thankful also to finally get it all out!

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So...A Gift

2011-11-08T07:04:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for an uninterrupted night of sleep.

When I was a new mom, I remember expressing to a friend (and experienced mom) how unprepared I felt for the lack of sleep that came along with a new baby. She laughed a little and assured me that I would be tired for the rest of my life.

Even though my kids have all been good sleepers and have slept through the night at a young age, it is rare that we make it through a night completely uninterrupted.

Someone will have to go potty.
Someone will have a nightmare.
Someone might have an accident.
Someone will lose their blankie.
Someone will need to be tucked in again.
Someone will try to sneak into our bed.
Someone will want cuddles.
Someone will need a drink.
Someone may sneak in just to kiss me on the cheek :)

I don't mean to be complaining. It actually doesn't bother me - it's just one of the parts of being a mom. Now, when there are three someones waking up multiple times a night for any or all of the above, that bothers me.

This morning I woke up and I didn't feel tired. That hardly ever happens. Especially when I'm pregnant.

I quickly realized the reason for my restfulness was that not one little body had woken up last night. I asked Husband if we had actually had an uninterrupted night of sleep (sometimes I don't wake up when they come in). He confirmed. I was astounded.

What a gift!

This pregnant mama is so thankful that her little kiddos gave her a little extra sleep and rest to get through another day of "climbing a mountain."

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So...Playmates

2011-11-07T07:00:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful that my sweet daughters are the best playmates.

I've been dragging lately, as my belly grows and my energy level shrinks.
I am so thankful that these girlies play so well together and that they forgive their mother for being busy making a baby.

Right now I can hear the muffled sounds of First and Second Daughter playing "Christmas morning" upstairs in the guest bedroom (in a British accent) and it makes my heart happy. They have no idea how much of a gift it is to their mother that they are great playmates.

And have I mentioned how incredibly patient my children are with me?
Well, they are.

One of the hardest part of pregnancy for me is not feeling on top of my game - or anywhere close - as a mother. I feel so sad for my kids when I feel so incapable. But thankfully, my kids are patient with me, they still love me, and in fact they understand and forgive me.

Second Daughter said to me just the other day, as I'm laying helplessly on the couch - "It's ok Mom. You just rest and take care of that baby."

First Daughter, just days before that, woke up with her little sisters, took them downstairs and poured them all cereal and milk, turned on the TV for them, and did her best to keep them out of our bedroom so Husband + I could sleep in. She later told me she just wanted to let us relax.

Third Daughter, last night, snuck into my bedroom just to give me a kiss on the cheek while I slept (or so she thought) and then climbed back into her bed without one word.

Besides being the best of playmates, these kiddos just simply are the best.

(stay tuned for more thankful posts starring the Daughters.)

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So...My Siblings

2011-11-06T07:36:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for my brothers and sister.

my wedding, October 2003
Sadly, this is the most recent picture I have of us all together. It was taken eight years ago.

My siblings have become my best friends, and most favorite people in the world. I love being around every single one of them. They are the ones who I feel like I can be 100% myself. 100% of the time. They always can make me laugh hard. And I like that they laugh at my jokes. They make me feel like I'm still funny and still pretty cool.

I love the memories and the bond we have. They are just the coolest people.
It's hard living so far away from most of them. Everytime I'm with each of them I feel like I need more of them in my life. I wish it was easier to get together. I love my siblings.

Since Little Brother has returned home from his mission, he has been out here attending BYU. I am loving this. I get to hang out with him at least once a week. I'm so glad that he likes to hang out with me. Though he was an annoying little brother for many of our growing up years, he has become one of my best friends. I love that he is a part of my girls lives.

Today I am thankful for my brothers and sister.
They are a huge blessing in my life, and four of the most important people to me.
I'm thankful for their love, support, and friendship.

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So...My Friends

2011-11-05T07:00:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for friends.
Well, everyday I'm thankful for friends.

I didn't realize how important friends were until I became a wife and mother. I've always been the independent type - don't really like to lean on others for support. I've always liked for things I did to be my own idea, or my own accomplishment. I've always liked to do my own thing in my own way and not have to check in with anyone. I've always preferred to be a leader, not a follower.

Growing up is humbling me.

I've discovered that no matter how I like things to be, no matter how independent I want to be (or think I am) I need others. I need support. I need help. I need to not feel alone. I need to feel understood, to feel appreciated, to feel important. I need friends. Close friends.

It wasn't until I became a mother that I realized how much I needed friends. I mean, I always had friends, but I never quite felt like I needed them, or needed to be close with them. When I became a mother, I found myself needing women in my life that I could relate to. Women that I could talk to about things that were meaningful to me and to them. Friends that I could depend on. Friends that could help uplift me. Women that understood the emotions I was struggling with and could support me through difficult times. Women that could show me unconditional love and patience. And that I could do the same for them.

Being a grown up is hard. Becoming a wife and a mother at such a young age, I had to grow up very quickly. There have been lots of things I have learned in the process - about myself, about others, and about life - and there are struggles I have faced along the way. Having good friends has made such a huge impact on who I've become and who I'm striving to be. I learn so much from the wonderful women in my life that I am blessed to call my friends.

And I truly believe that the Lord answers our prayers, and shows us His love, through the people that are in our lives. Especially our friends.

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So...My Body

2011-11-04T07:00:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for my body.

Even though I don't always feel like it as of late - with all the growing, and stretching, and squishing, and aching - it is true. I am thankful for my body and all that it can do.

From growing a baby...

...to running a half marathon...

...to healing itself, and everything else.

My body is a gift, and I am thankful for it.

p.s. I am 29 weeks pregnant with a baby BOY!

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So...Our Home

2011-11-03T11:36:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for our home.

Last March we moved literally around the corner into a new (to us) home. This house provides us with more space, more room to grow, and thus more time living in this neighborhood that we love oh so very much.

The circumstances (on our end of the deal) around us ending up in this house was nothing short of miraculous. Even in the middle of a recession and a horrible housing market, everything fell perfectly into place for us to sell our previous house and purchase our new one without any glitches. The fact that we never had a month with a double mortgage payment was a miracle in of itself, among many.

Some many blessings fell into our laps surrounding this move. It was a risk, moving during such economic uncertainty and being upside-down in our previous mortgage, but we approached the decision prayerfully, trusting that things would work out the way they were meant to. And as we watched every roadblock we encountered (and there were lots - along with all the hoops we had to jump through with the banks) pass us by, our prayers for guidance were turned to prayers of thanksgiving as it becamse clear that this move was in fact the right thing for us to do, and that the Lord had provided a way.

Our home is perfect for us.

After six months of settling in, it feels very much like home.

And as heartbreaking as it was for me to leave our other home - the home full of so many of our memories; the home we brought two babies home to; the home we lived in during such precious years of our family's life - I see a whole future of family memories here before us. I can picture my babies as teenagers sitting at this new counter doing their homework or chatting with me while I cook. And that makes me happy.

I know we have many wonderful years ahead of us here in this home, and I am so thankful.

I am thankful to have a beautiful home in which we can raise our beautiful family.

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So...I'm Thankful

2011-11-02T07:44:00.000-07:00

Today I am thankful for patience.

Patience is a virtue I am constantly trying to acquire. I'm never quite sure if I get it. It seems the more patience I exercise, the farther my patience is tested and pushed just barely out of my reach. It often feels right at my fingertips, but just far enough away that I can't quite grasp it.

The idea, I think, is that as it is challenged it will be stretched and therefore it will grow. I hope this is happening. I pray everyday for more patience than the day before, more patience than I feel I have, and more patience that my family deserves. I go forward with faith, believing and hoping that my little successes can be magnified through my efforts and desire to be better.

But that's not the patience I am thankful for.

I am thankful for the patience of others.

I am not perfect.
In fact, I'm no where close.
I make mistakes all the time. One's I really wish I didn't make.
I say stupid things.
I hurt people's feelings.
I yell at my kids.
I don't do things I know I'm supposed to do.
I don't do things I know I want to do.
I can be thoughtless.
I can be careless.
I can be selfish.
I get frustrated with others.
I can get pretty down on myself.
I complain.
Sometimes I even whine.

And I very easily can get frustrated with myself and all of these things that I do that I wish I didn't. I get frustrated that I can recognize these things that I do that I don't want to be doing - or the things that I'm not doing that I want to be doing. I get frustrated and discouraged that I'm not succeeding at changing, or that I can't see my progress.
I don't have very much patience with myself.
(And if you don't either, read this talk - it's so very good.)

But I am incredibly thankful for the patience that others have with me. I am thankful for their forgiveness and unconditional love.

Patience, I believe, is one of the most genuine forms of love.

I am thankful that they can look past my flaws, mistakes, and weaknesses (even when I can't) and still be my friend. I am thankful for their example. It is so helpful and motivating to have inspiring examples of patient people in my life.

Husband is the ultimate example to me - of so many things, but especially patience.
He is patient with me, through my mistakes and weaknesses, but also through my struggle to be patient with myself. He hears my complaints, my discouragements, my frustrations, my struggles, my sadness, and listens very patiently. Repeatedly. He doesn't get frustrated with me. He listens and tries to help, even though I know he doesn't relate to the same feelings I struggle with. He loves me, and I feel his love for me all the time. Unconditionally. To say that I am thankful for his patience is an understatement.

And I am incredibly thankful (though this merits it's own thankful post) for the fact that through the love and patience of the Savior, I can try again each day to be a little better. Through and because of Him, my weaknesses can become my strengths.
I truly believe that.
And for that I am thankful.

So...you may also like:
::So...Thankful
::So...Thankful Poems
::So...Today

Thanks for stopping by!

So...A Backyard Visitor

2011-08-08T14:31:00.000-07:00

One afternoon back in July, I looked out the window and saw this:

I took a double-take.
Is that an animal up in my tree???

At first I thought it was a cat.
No...that's too big to be a cat.

Then I thought it was a koala bear.
Then I remembered I live in Utah.

Then I thought it looked kind of like a sloth.

Again, I live in Utah.
Sloths don't live in Utah.
I don't think.

Could it be a racoon?
I know racoons live in Utah, even though I have never seen one.
But can racoon climb trees?

Yes, yes they can.

I called animal control about this "little" visitor.
He was awake and out during the day, and twitching a little bit, which made me very nervous. Especially being outside with our dogs - one of whom does not have a rabies vaccine {{i know, i know. my head is hanging with shame}}.

The guy from animal control showed up later that night.
He said there was nothing he could do.
Isn't that what you do Mr. Animal Control Guy????

In the words of my brother-inlaw -
"Thank you for nothing"

Where's Tim Riggins when you need him?!

So...Your Welcome :)

2011-06-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

So...Stylish Blogger

2011-06-14T06:00:00.000-07:00

So...anyone miss me?
Ya - sorry about the lack of blogging.
Not really sure what that's all about, except that I have just been doing other things and life seems to just keep on going.

During my short blogging sabbatical, my dear friend Ginger awarded me a Stylish Blogger Award over at her blog Ginger Unplugged.

Thank you Ginger! I have mentioned her blog before and how much I love it, but have I mention how much I love her? Ginger is one of the most amazing people I know. She is an incredibly talented writer (whose published, by the way), inspiring mother, great friend, and pretty much good at everything she does. I look up to her in so many ways and feel lucky to call her my friend.

And I absolutely love her blog. She always makes me laugh.

So, thank you Ginger, for awarding me the Stylish Blogger Award, even though my blog really isn't that stylish :)

Along with the award comes a few responsibilities:

1. Thank and link to the person who nominated you.
2. Share seven random facts about yourself.
3. Pass the award along to five blogging buddies.
4. Contact those buddies to congratulate them.

Since it's been awhile since I've shared random facts about me, this should be a little fun.

#1) Once I heard that a sobriety test was to sing the alphabet backward. I practiced and practiced just in case I ever was pulled over and accused of drunk driving. I wasn't confident that I would pass the test sober.

#2) My favorite candy bar is a Strawberry Charleston Chew. They're hard to find, so whenever I come across one I feel the need to buy it. Just in case.

#3) I do not like cats. I have a strange feeling that they are plotting to take over the world and I am not comfortable with that.

#4) I have been hypnotized. In fact, the hypnotist convinced me that I was Britney Spears and succeeded to get me to sing and dance on stage in front of my high school student body. This is proof that I was in fact hypnotized.

#5) I can play all of the string instruments. I can only play one well.

#6) When I was a kid, and asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always said an architect (?). Not really sure why, but that was my profession of choice until high school. Then I wanted to be a professional athlete. Seems a bit backwards, no?

#7) I tried out for my high school girls' ice hockey team. After the first day, I realized that not knowing how to ice skate was a huge problem and decided to go with indoor lacrosse instead.

So...that's it. I know they are a bit random, but I was trying to think of things not on my list of 200 things. I was too lazy to read through them all again, so I'm not sure if I repeated or not. Either way, it was fun to dig up so random facts.

And the five blogs I'm passing this award on to are:

At Full Capacity
Who Dub It
Copper Kettles
Kel's Version of it All
Farmer Freitas' Wife

...and anyone else who feels like participating! If you do, put a link in the comments!

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::So...200 Buttons
::So...It's Been Awhile Since I've Been "It"
::So...25 Random Things About Me

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Bummer

2011-05-18T07:21:00.000-07:00

So...sad news.
We have lost all our pictures from 2011.
Of course we still have the ones on blogger, the ones on photobucket, and the few that we printed - thank goodness.

But it is true.
Our pictures are gone.

And so...
There will be no pictures from First Daughter's birthday, our new house, or Easter - to mention a few.
Bummer.

Between blogger having issues and our server {and backup} having issues, this was not a good week for family documentation.

But it is ok.
Thank goodness it was only 5 months, not all of our pictures.
And thank goodness it was only pictures.
Our family is happy and healthy and together creating memories.
That's what really matters.

Oh...and a lot of my poems are gone too :(

So...you may also like:
::So...Today was a Great Day
::So...The New Year
::So...What Can I Do When My Body Says No?

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Guest Posting::On The Floor

2011-05-17T07:00:00.000-07:00

Check out my guest post today over at

Taste of T.

I am so excited for Tanya and her new sweet baby girl. Being a mother is the best.

Especially for the first time.

Thanks Tanya for letting me share some thoughts on being a mama!
It is something so dear to my heart.

So...you may also like:

::Monday Memories 029: New Mom

::Write Away: Six Word Memoirs

::So...It's About Them

Thanks for stopping by!

So...16 Favorites

2011-05-16T06:50:00.000-07:00

01::finding musical scribbles in First Daughter's notebook.
02::dreaming about home projects.
03::swimming pool sized bath tub.
04::a co-write.
05::Grandma & Grandpa here for First Daughter's birthday.
06::late-overs. {genius subsitute for sleepovers}
07::the river trail. tree swing and all.
08::sun.
09::personal training sessions. i'm a believer.
10::supportive friends.
11::music.
12::poetry.
13::Husband.
14::my family.
15::chocolate covered pomegranates.
16::much needed roadtrip.

So...you may also like:
::So...16 Favorites april.
::So...16 Favorites march.
::So...16 Favorites february.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Mothers' Day Favorites

2011-05-11T06:51:00.000-07:00

::daffodils in the sunshiney window.
::handmade book with original illustrations.
::homemade button picture frame filled with photo of my three favorite girls.
::tradition to visit Grandma Bonita {and picture of the three Bonitas}.
::visit from grandparents all the way from Boston.
::First Daughter turning six.
::four generations.

So...you may also like:
::So...It's About Them
::So...My Proudest Moment
::So...Another One

Thanks for stopping by!

So...A Girl and Her Cupcake

2011-05-10T06:25:00.000-07:00

Mmm. That cupcake looks good.What's that bright, hot, firey-looking thing on top?
Oh! It's a candle! I guess I'm supposed to blow it out.I wish...I wish...I wish for more cupcakes...
Let's see if this thing is any good...
Mmm...that's actually a pretty good cupcake!
Sister, you should really try these cupcakes. They are soooo good.
Oops, sorry for spitting crumbs at you while I talked with my mouth full.I just can't get over how good these cupcakes are!
Don't mind if I do...

So...you may also like:

::To Throw A Little Einsteins Party

::Monday Memories 020:: Third Daughter

::So...How to Make Rainbow Cupcakes

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 029: New Mom

2011-05-09T07:00:00.000-07:00

May 8, 2005
Six years ago yesterday, I became a mother for the first time. The perfect gift on my first Mothers' Day.

The labor was long - 14 hours or so - but everything was new, a little bit scary, and extremely exciting. We knew our lives would change as soon as that baby was born and we could hardly wait.

We went to the hospital at 11:45 pm Saturday night. I suspected that I was leaking amniotic fluid, but wasn't sure. We went to the hospital assuming we would be coming home shortly after. We didn't expect we would have our baby.

After being checked, the nurse told me that I was in fact leaking amniotic fluid and would need to be induced. I was hooked up to pitocin shortly after midnight, and given the epidural about an hour later.

The night was long. The nurses kept telling me to try to get some sleep while we waited for things to progress, but it was too hard. With the anticipation and excitement of a new baby along with a blood pressure machine squeezing my arm every ten minutes, it was near impossible.

My first mistake was coming to the hospital on an empty stomach. I didn't know that I wouldn't be able to eat once the epidural was in. I hadn't eaten since dinner the night before. I was hungry! My second mistake was going to the hospital at 11:45 pm, without taking a nap first. With no sleep and no food all night, I was pretty exhausted when it was time for baby to arrive.

The day was full of lots of waiting. With an epidural I couldn't feel most of the labor and contractions that went on all day. I honestly don't remember what we did all day. I only remember trying desperately to sleep and not being very successful.

About twelve hours into the labor - at noon on Sunday - I had finally progressed far enough to start pushing. Unfortunately, my pushing wasn't doing very much. At one point, the nurse even left Husband and I alone and told us to "keep practice pushing" while she was gone. {???!!!} I asked what we should do if the baby started coming and she assured us that the baby wasn't coming anytime very soon.

The doctor came in and we pushed a little more. Things were still not progressing. First Daughter was stuck in the birth canal and her head was turned. At this point they weren't too concerned, but weren't very hopeful that things would progress quickly. The doctor left to go deliver some other babies - two C-sections and another delivery at a different hospital.

At 2:00 pm the doctor returned and my condition hadn't changed much. I had been pushing for two hours and still no baby. After threatening a C-section, and with assistance from some forceps that looked a lot like a torture device, I was able to buckle down and get our baby out around 2:25 pm.

The moment I heard her newborn baby cry, I had no breath. It was the most amazing sound I had ever heard. I was overcome with emotion in those minutes after her birth. I felt so much love for her and so much love for Husband. We were a family. I instantly realized the significance of that moment. It was as if time slowed down.

I remember sobbing when they handed me my sweet new bundle. The nurses kept asking if I was ok and I assured them I had never been better.

Weeks before First Daughter's birth I was very concerned about the delivery. "What if I can't get her out?" or "What if I don't love her enough right away?" were a couple of my concerns. Little did I know how natural it would feel to have this new baby in my arms and in my heart. She belonged to us and I felt that. It was as if she had always been a part of our family. I'm pretty sure she was.

I couldn't have asked for a better first child than First Daughter. She is amazing. Since the day she was born I have felt overwhelmed with gratitude for the chance to be her mother. She is so smart, loving, enthusiastic, joyful, and fun. She challenges me in all of the best ways. Being her mother has already made me a better person and continues to do so.

I pray everyday to be the mother she needs me to be. As I have expressed before, being a mother can sometimes feel overwhelming. I worry about being a good mother. I especially worry about being a good mother for First Daughter. Partly because she's my first and partly because of how she challenges me. I worry that she will suffer because of my weaknesses. I pray everyday to be strengthened and guided as mother to her.

I love her more than I can even express. Being her mom is the best.

Happy Birthday First Daughter!!!

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::So...My Strongest Desire
::So...Disclaimer
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Thanks for stopping by!

So...2011 Girl Mix

2011-05-06T07:28:00.000-07:00

Because last year's Girl Mix was such a huge hit {it still plays faithfully in our car stereo} I thought it was time for another. Not sure how this will compare with the other, but it's full of some of our all time favorites, mixed with a few new ones. Can't go wrong with Justin Bieber. Or NSync.

Girl Mix 2011

Sk8ter Boi::Avril Lavigne
Somebody to Love::Justin Bieber
Round & Round::Selena Gomez & The Scene
Ordinary Girls::Miley Cyrus
When Will My Life Begin::Mandy Moore
I'm Yours::Jason Mraz
Bad Day::Daniel Powter
How to Believe::Ruby Summer
Magic::Selena Gomez
It's Gonna Be Me::NSync
When You're Gone::Avril Lavigne
I See the Light::Mandy Moore
Once Upon A Dream::Emily Osment
Firework::Katy Perry
I Gotta Feeling::The Black Eyed Peas
Lucky::Jason Mraz ft. Colbie Caillat
Viva la Vida::Coldplay
Gift of a Friend::Demi Levato
Fly::Hilary Duff
Never Say Never::Justin Bieber

Leave me a comment if you would like you're own.
Nothing like a list of fun songs to sing along in the car to with your kiddos.
Perfect for a sun shiny day.

And if you haven't yet received last year's and would like a copy, let me know.
I'd be happy to send you both.

**WSGMS Pick of the Week**

So...you may also like:
::So...A Summer Mix Giveaway girl mix 2010.
::So...A Playlist more favs.
::Dave & Meg's Wedding Mix over at wsmgs.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Considering A Half

2011-05-05T06:33:00.000-07:00

I have caught the bug again.
I want to run another half marathon.

I have not been focusing much on running since my race last July. I actually just ran a 5k last weekend - my first race since the big one - and it reminded me how much I love to run. I had forgotten a little.

But I'm feeling the desire to run again. I mean really run.
And so...next week I plan to start my half marathon training.

I'm thinking about running the American Fork Canyon Half Marathon which gives me 7 weeks.
I have to admit, I'm very nervous. And not sure I can do it. I'm not sure if that's enough time.
I haven't ran more than 3 miles in a very long time.
But I'm going to try.
This is my plan {how many miles I will run each day}, in case you are curious:

I'm hoping the weather stays somewhat nice/warm to encourage me to keep running.
There are few things better than running outside on a warm sunny morning.

Wish me luck!

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::So...My First Training Schedule 5k.
::So...It's Official taking the first step.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::05

2011-05-04T06:01:00.000-07:00

05::Writing helps.

I am a talker.

I am a thinker.

I am an over analyzer.

And I'm pretty emotional. :)

Being a stay-at-home mom leaves lots of time to think, not a lot of outlet to express, and few opportunities for feedback. This has been challenging for me. I feel like I have so many things I'm thinking about throughout the day and so many things I want to talk about and figure out, but no one to talk to.

I mean, besides my little kiddos.

And I guess I could call Husband throughout the day and tell him everything that's on my mind, but I feel silly doing that.

Don't get me wrong, I do plenty of talking.

In the six years I've been a mom, I have gotten better about finding ways to fill this need. I have developed great friendships with women that I enjoy and appreciate talking with so much. I have learned that the art of texting comes in handy when needing and wanting to share something with Husband. I have overcome some of my insecurities of my need to connect with others who I assume are too busy. I have made time to get together with friends when I can and try really hard not feel guilty about time spent away from the family.

I have discovered how much writing has helped me balance my emotions and my need to share.

With writing there is no insecurity. There is no inconvenience. The page is available for me any time I need it. There is no risk of offense {I guess unless someone reads it...}. My words can always be taken back {again - as long as I keep it to myself :)}. I can express things that I need to just get out. And then I can sort through the mess and figure out what it is I really feel. Then I can decide what I really need to share and what is better left unsaid. It has been a wonderful discovery and has helped me so much.

Writing has also helped me see how much I have grown. One of my favorite things to do is go back and read old journal entries or blog posts. Remembering where I've come from helps me keep the present in perspective. When I'm feeling sad, it helps to read through times when I was happy and remember what I'm grateful for. When I'm happy, reading entries from hard times makes me grateful for the lessons I've learned and the growth I have experienced.

But the best thing that writing has done for me specifically as a mother, is help me remember how much I truly love my kiddos. Not that I need much reminding, but reading back on memories of them, and the feelings I had about being a mother, helps me remember and refocus on what I'm really doing here.

It's kind of like looking back on wedding pictures and remembering how madly in love Husband & I were on that day. How we could hardly keep ourselves from smiling. How we couldn't keep our eyes off each other. How desperately we couldn't wait to spend the rest of our lives together. It reinforces my commitment to Husband and refuels my love for Him.

Writing has done that for me and my kiddos.

Writing today, will do that again for me in the future when I need some recharging.

And hopefully, someday my writing will help my daughters when they become mothers and are learning step-by-step as I am.

So...you may also like:

::Write Away: Why Do You Write? on writing.

::So...Seeing the Joy on blogging.

::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::04 on sleeping.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Girls' Room

2011-05-03T06:00:00.000-07:00

Been working in the Daughters' bedroom...
And I think I finally have a vision for what it will become.

I have painted the green walls to light pink and the blue trim to white. Ahhh.

I am so in love with this tree I saw on Just A Girl about a year ago.
I've been dreaming about it ever since and think I'm about ready to attempt my own for the Daughters' new room. I just need to figure out how to do it...

{picture via Just A Girl}

I have painted their room a light pink similar to that bed spread, and am debating between an all-white tree or brown trunk/branches with white leaves/blossoms.

We still have the same bunkbeds and the pink/white/brown comforters I made two years ago that you can kind of see in this picture.

I still have these butterflies I plan on putting back up flying out of the tree:

And I hope to paint our dresser like this, only with light green stripes:

{picture via House of Smith's}

I would like these lamps from IKEA to put by the girls' beds for nighttime reading:

And possibly this chandelier:

Still looking for some curtains. Probably something lacey and girly and pretty.
And brainstorming ideas for a reading nook in their closet.
Stayed tuned for how it all turns out.

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::So...Unexpected Redecorating will be redoing our master again soon.
::So...The Purging of Toys has happened again. and i love it.

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 028: Visit From Grandma

2011-05-02T07:42:00.000-07:00

Thanksgiving Point with Grandma, June 2006

This week my parents are in town and we will be celebrating First Daughter's sixth birthday. We are all very excited to have them here, but the Daughters are beyond thrilled.

Visits from Grandma is always a treat. This visit back in 2006 is a memorable one for me and this series of pictures are some of my favorites.

In June 2006 we had just moved into our first house in Provo. First Daughter was 13 months old. Life was so very sweet.

A favorite outing while Grandma is here is to the Thanksgiving Point Gardens. It's so peaceful and beautiful. We love to walk along the paths through the gardens, roll down the grassy hills, look down over the waterfall, explore through the Children's Discovery Garden, and sit in a sunny spot and just bask. It is so perfect. We look forward to returning there this week for the Tulip Festival while Grandma & Grandpa are here.

I love these pictures of First Daughter - mostly because I remember this trip to Thanksgiving Point so vividly. I remember watching her run around {she had only been walking for about a month or so} and getting so excited at every little thing she saw. I remember her little chubby fingers gently touching the flower petals. I remember watching her discover the world around her as if for the first time. She seemed no longer to be a baby, but a little person, all of her own.

She walked with her elbows bent up and her hands by her shoulders for balance. She stuck her belly out and smiled wide. She was so very proud.

First Daughter turns six next Sunday. It doesn't seem long ago that it was just us, taking long walks and just being together.

She still approaches life and the world with as much enthusiasm as she did when she was one - and I'm so glad. She is such a joy in our life and I feel so lucky to be her mama.

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::Monday Memories 019: Winter Outing
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::Monday Memories 014: Winter Swingin'

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Be Kind

2011-04-30T12:58:00.000-07:00

"Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

I would like to add::
"Be kind and thoughtful and forgiving and don't take things personally for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

And on the flip side::
"Be kind even when you are fighting your own battle."

Bottom line, just be kind.

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::So...Good People great advice.
::So...A Little Stairway... always applicable.
::So...Lessons to Learn all of us.

Thanks for stopping by!

WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert

2011-04-29T12:00:00.000-07:00

"Fool in the Rain" by Led Zepplin
One of my most favorite songs of all time.

Band #5 in concert.

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::WSGMS Pick of the Week::In Concert #1::aerosmith.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert #2::allman brothers.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert #3::paul simon.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Uplifting

2011-04-28T04:55:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been feeling a desperate need to surround myself with all things positive and uplifting. My head and my heart have been consumed with all sorts of emotions {most of which I don't feel in control of} for the past couple months, and the reality is I am not fully equipped to roll with the punches of everyday thoughtlessness and carelessness. I'm just not.

And there's nobody to blame here but mere circumstances.
It's just the way it is.

I'm finding that I must be very proactive and deliberate in which doors I am opening and which ones I am shutting.
I need to surround myself with all things good, uplifting, and inspiring. At least for the time being.
I need to make sure that I am not becoming thoughtless and careless because of my circumstances or my currently weakened emotional capacity.
I want to limit as much collateral damage as possible.
I've been saying sorry, a lot.

So...in my small quest to find upliftment, I opened this book:

Reflections on life, relationships, and womanhood - and it is just what I needed.

"The most exhausting thing in life, I have discovered, is being insincere." p. 32

"The inter-relatedness of the world links us constantly with more people than our hearts can hold....My life cannot implement in action the demands of all the people to whom my heart responds." p. 124

This is exactly how I've been feeling.
It's all about simplifying - in all aspects of life.
Quality not quantity.

And it always helps to received thoughtful, sincere, caring words of encouragement.
Thank you to those who have.

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Thanks for stopping by!

So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::04

2011-04-27T05:21:00.000-07:00

04::Sleep works wonders.

When I was pregnant with First Daughter, I was given a book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child. I remember thinking "how funny to get a book about teaching your baby how to sleep!" Sleep seemed like one of those things that just happens. Like, instinctual. Little did I know how much I would come to appreciate that book and the effects of a good night of sleep. On baby and parents.

You remember when you were a kid and your parents would say, "you must be tired" when you were upset over something? Well, I do. I remember very vividly my parents telling me that and I remember how angry it made me. I was not tired!

Well, it was true. I was.
And now I see so clearly in my kids, what my parents saw in me then.
Sleepy kids are not happy kids.

And you know what?
Sleepy parents are not happy parents.
I can't tell you how many of our tantrums {by kiddos or mama} are caused by lack of sleep.

I have learned in the few short years that I have been a mom, that sleep makes all the difference. My kiddos naps are a priority. I hang on to them as long as possible. There is so much good - for them and for me - that comes from naptime. Bedtime is also a priority. Even if it means cutting activities and plans short. It is so totally worth it.

And even though I may be tempted to stay up late and have some extra me time, I know I will be happier {and a better mom} the next day if I go to sleep. And, if I have a chance to take a nap, I take it. Hands down. There will always be another chance to unload the dishwasher or fold the laundry. Sleep is precious and naps for mama are a gift. Or at least they are to me. And oh how I miss the days when I got them.

And nighttime sleep habits are a whole different conversation...
Let's just say, I learned {and my family learned} the hard way that this mama is not so pleasant when woken up at night. Or early in the morning. And I spent years feeling guilty for not being happy to rock my babies in the middle of the night and sing them songs to sleep. It also took me a couple years to wake Husband up and ask him for help.

But you know what? I'm so glad that I got over that. Everyone was happier when I realized this was one of my limits and we did what was necessary for our family to sleep through the night.

And now we all have hours of uninterrupted sleep every night!
I never thought this day would come. Seriously.
But it's here! At least for a while. :O)

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::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::02
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Thanks for stopping by!
and thanks for coming back::it makes me happy knowing someone out there is reading

So...Morning on the Trail

2011-04-26T07:44:00.000-07:00

{Husband & I on the bridge, 2003}

We took our first walk on the river trail yesterday morning.
The air was cool on our cheeks and our breath was warm. The water was high and sparkling from the sunlight peeking out from the clouds. There were blossoms and baby leaves reaching over the trail hanging off the tree branches. Through holes in the canopy I could see the melting snow topped mountains. I could hear birds chirping and my girls chattering in the stroller. I smelled spring - water, grass, and growth. The moment was sweet. The type that makes me want to stop, press pause, and take it all in.

My eyes were drawn to the magical water flowing next to us and I couldn't help but think how beautiful it was. It kept rushing past faster than I wanted it to. I wanted to reach down and hold a piece of that beauty in my hand for a moment, but I couldn't even if I tried.

And I thought, life is kind of like that.
Sometimes it feels as if it's rushing by - too fast to grab a hold of.
Sometimes it is so beautiful, so serene, that I can't help but pause and take it all in.

So...you may also like:
::So...An Honest Note to Self it makes such a difference.
::So...Peace from the Creator of all.
::So...I Couldn't Not i just love her.

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 027: Hannah's Big Day

2011-04-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

My next guest blogger is my friend and neighbor, Hannah. Hannah is darling - beautiful, sweet, thoughtful, ambitious, hard-working, faithful, poised, and incredibly creative. She is a wonderful mother, and a fun friend. I have loved getting to know her better in the past few years and appreciate her friendship so much. I always feel good after leaving a conversation with Hannah. She is genuine and I love that about her.

I've told you before how inspired I am by Hannah from Sherbet Blossom. She is the reason {whether she knew it at the time or not} that I took the plunge into starting my own personal blog - and she has continued to encourage me every step of the way.

Her blog is a favorite - of mine and of many. She writes about finding the joy in the little things of motherhood and family life, as well as beauty tips, crafts, and great giveaways. If you haven't been to Sherbet Blossom before, make sure to check it out.

Making that big of a commitment was scary, especially at age 19. My parents and I loaded in the car early on a Thursday morning, with my puffy, princess-esqe dress in a giant garment bag. I was hours away from marrying my best friend.

The night before, my family sat around the living room talking, excitement and worry for the next day was thick in the air. I received a father's blessing. My dad told me that I would be happy in this union I was about to enter. He told me that he loved me and that my Heavenly Father was happy with my decisions.

I tossed and turned in bed that night. 90% excitement. 10% apprehension. I looked around my room. It was a bit surreal to think I was leaving a stage of my life to start a new one with Jason. I was finally comforted when I set aside my worries of "what" was going to happen the next say and focused on the "who" it was happening with. I knew I loved him. I had no doubt in my mind that Jason was the one for me.

The drive to the temple seemed an eternity. My dad teased me. "This is your last chance, Hannah! No backing out after we get there!" I laughed and rolled my eyes at my dad. I was appreciative of the contentment and peace I had received the night before. I didn't want to back out. I had my eye on the prize. Jason truly is a prize.

We knelt across from each other in the temple, promising the other that we would love them for eternity. Jason and I walked hand-in-hand from the temple that day, and we haven't let go since. Marrying Jason was the best decision I ever made.

Oh, how I love happy endings. Thank you Hannah for sharing this sweet story!

Are you interested in sharing your story for a future Monday Memories? You are more than welcome to! Email me at meg.sobuttons@gmail.com.

So...you may also like:
::Monday Memories 026: Julie's Do
::Monday Memories 025: Casey's Twins
::Monday Memories 024: Kelly's First Day of College

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Honestly Mean

2011-04-23T12:27:00.000-07:00

Saying something mean in the name of "being honest"
doesn't make it any less mean.

So...you may also like:
::So...It Feels Good always.
::So...Conference Gem love them.
::So...Never Listen ever.

Thanks for stopping by!

WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert

2011-04-22T10:32:00.000-07:00

"Free Falling" by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers
The best part about this song - it always sounds better if you sing along at the top of your lungs.
No matter how bad your voice is - it always sounds awesome.

Band #4 in concert.

So...you may also like:
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert paul simon.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert allman bros.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert aerosmith.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Granola Bars

2011-04-21T07:00:00.000-07:00

{picture via Make&Takes}

I have had this recipe for granola bars starred and saved for a year or so. I haven't made them in quite some time and boy have I missed them. They are so very good.

Better than any granola bars I've bought {and cheaper}.
Better than most {not all} cookies.
Easy to make, with ingredients I almost always have on hand.
Triple win.

You can subsitute the mini-M&Ms for anything - I usually do butterscotch + choc. chips, but you could do raisins, craisins, peanuts, reeses pieces, white choc. chips, whatever.
Let your imagination go wild, or use whatever you have on hand.
I imagine they are all equally delicious.

Plus, they can be individually wrapped and packed.
Wouldn't mind one of these babies in your school lunch, would ya?
Yummy, yummy.

So...you may also like:
::So...Yummy another favorite snack.
::So...New Favorite favorite cookies.
::So...Yummy:Thai Chicken Pizza double yum.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::03

2011-04-20T05:21:00.000-07:00

03::Be who you want them to be.

This one can be hard. And overwhelming. And daunting.
But it's true.
And it's important.

The first time I heard First Daughter yell at Second Daughter is when I realized the impact my actions had on her. I mean, I knew it, but in that moment I understood it. I witnessed it. How could I put her in time-out for yelling at her sister when I had yelled at her? I did, but I shouldn't have. She was just following my example.

Another time when First and Second Daughters were playing house, First Daughter said, "I'm the mom! Go to your room right now!" I was speechless. I even intervened and asked, "Is that what you think moms sound like?" First Daughter said she didn't know. I felt horrible.

I tell my children to be kind, patient, sharing, forgiving, loving, understanding, thoughtful, inclusive, slow-to-anger, hard-working, faithful, grateful, content, humble, etc. etc. I can tell them what to be all day long, but am I showing them?

Am I these things? I'm trying to be. But like all things, I am not perfect.
Am I showing them how to be that kind of person? I hope I am. I want to be. I'm trying to.

A couple weeks ago during the LDS General Conference, I heard a wonderful talk about teaching your children what to be instead of only what to do. It was so powerful to me. It is so easy to get caught up in teaching the what-to-do's and the what-not-to-dos. That's part of the mom's job description - to teach right and wrong. But am I teaching the what-to-be's?

The reality of my responsibilities is not only to teach right and wrong do's, but right and wrong be's. I want to be teaching "Don't hit because it's mean and hurtful" not just "Don't hit."

Because really what I'm doing here is trying to raise children into responsible, respectable, and respectful human beings. I want them to choose the right because it's right, not because it's what Mom told me to do. And how will they know {and believe} that something is right if I'm not living it myself. I mean, how confusing is that?

Being the example is way more powerful than saying the words.
If I want my children to be something, I need to be it too.
After all, I am the mom.

And hopefully, one thing I am showing my kids, is how to say sorry, keep trying, and to be a little better everyday.

So...you may also like:
::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::01 everybody has limits.
::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::02 i am the mother.
::So...Seeing the Joy a choice.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Disclaimer

2011-04-19T20:00:00.000-07:00

So...obviously I've been thinking a lot lately about motherhood. I've kind of gone on a kick of writing it all down and sharing it with all of you.

What inspired this?
Truly, I'm not really sure.
I think it has something to do with me wanting to refocus on my family and wanting to be better than I am. Maybe it has something to do with wanting to fill my life with positive things and get rid of the negative. Maybe it has something to do with the whirlwind my life has been the past few months. Maybe it's because I know some changes need to be made.

Now, those of you who have seen me in person lately {especially around my kids} may notice that I am not doing so well at remembering the things I'm learning or at taking my own advice.

I just want you to know that I do not think I know everything {or very much for that matter} about motherhood. I am learning. Everyday. I have many weaknesses in the motherhood department. There are many characteristics needed in motherhood that I do not think come naturally to me.

And so, I am working, and trying, and learning.

I hope my posts are not coming across like I think I'm some sort of mothering expert. In fact, who really is? I will be the first to admit {and warn you} that I am in fact not. Most days I feel like a kid playing house. Most days I feel like a kid period. A very immature kid.

But other days I recognize that I am in fact an adult, I am in fact a mother, and I in fact do want to be a good mother. And so, I'm trying to figure out how to be a little better everyday. For my kids' sakes.

Writing it down helps me figure out what I'm really thinking. Writing it down helps me make sense of it. Writing it down helps me remember. A perfect example of some of the reasons why I write.

So...if I'm making you feel like a bad mother or that you're doing something wrong, please stop reading. If I sound like I think I'm a better mother than you, or anyone else, please come over to my house for a while and you'll see the reality of the situation. I have my good moments and bad moments like every other mother. And I am definitely not perfect.

Do I think my way is the only way? Absolutely not.
Do I think I have all the answers? HA! That's a negative ghost rider.

My hope is that as I sort though what I've already learned and what I am currently learning, I will continue to learn, grow, and keep my head on straight. I hope that something I share may be inspiring or uplifting to someone else. At the very least, I hope that some of the things I'm sharing are things that others can relate to and a way for us to connect.

After all, we all have some way to connect to each other through our experiences, even if we don't have the exact same circumstances.

So...you may also like:
::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::01
::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::02
::So...Seeing the Joy

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Don't Worry, Mom

2011-04-19T07:00:00.000-07:00

Don't worry, Mom
Everything will be okay.
I know we'll be together
Forever, someday.

Don't cry, Mom
Not for me.
I'm being taken care of.
Someday, you'll see.

Don't fear, Mom.
God is good.
It wouldn't be so painful
If you just understood.

Don't be sad, Mom
Try to smile.
Please be patient
And wait a while.

Don't give up, Mom
I need you still
To be there when I come.
Someday, I will.

Poetic Asides PAD Challenge: day six - "Dont _____, ______"

So...you may also like:
::So...You Speak
::So...Always Your Mama
::So...My Strongest Desire

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 026: Julie's Do

2011-04-18T05:22:00.000-07:00

My next Monday Memories guest blogger is Julie. We are cousins by marriage, and I feel so lucky to be related to her. She is kind, thoughtful, hilarious, whitty, caring, a wonderful mother (full of great advice, by the way), a just an awesome person. She says things how they are. I love that about her.

And I love her blog. I love seeing pictures of her beautiful baby girl, reading her stories and book recommendation, and her commentary on life. She is hilarious.

Julie is one of my favorite people to be around. Everytime I'm with her I think "why don't I spend more time with her?" Still asking myself that question...

This picture was taken around 4:30 am, over ten years ago, on the day I married my husby. When I see this picture I remember how excited I was. Not one bit tired.

The night before, I hung out with my sister, Becky, my cousin, Amy, and my best friend, Rachel. We spent the night in the apartment Matt and I would live in. It was a mess. I had already moved in a few days before and Matt’s stuff was there too. Nothing was unpacked.

I remember sitting on the kitchen counter with my feet in the sink while Becky gave me a pedicure. I can’t remember the color of the nail polish.

I can’t remember anything else we did that night, except for the four of us all trying to sleep on one queen size bed. We laid sideways in a row. One of us was at the top where the pillows would go, two in the middle and one down at the foot of the bed. We talked and talked. I slept for less than an hour.

We left the apartment at 3am. And went over to the home of my friend, Katie, where her sister, Heidi, did my hair for the big day. I intentionally planned to wear that button down shirt so I wouldn’t have to pull one over The Do to get into my wedding dress. Good thinking, right?

Heidi did a wonderful job. Exactly what I asked for, which was not easy. I have a lot of hair.

From there, the four of us drove my black Nissan Altima to the Oakland Temple, where I was married and sealed for time and all eternity to my one and only sweetheart. The best decision I made in my life.

With all that went on that day, the dress, the flowers, the pictures, the cake, the covenants, the hair was pretty minor. But between the hair and the beautiful dress my Aunt Mary made for me, I felt like a princess… Like a princess with her very own prince. It was wonderful.

Thank you Julie! I absolutely love stories about wedding days. Brings back lots of wonderful memories. And it was fun to hear about your day since I didn't meet you until after you two were married. Thanks for sharing a memory from such a special day.

Are you interested in sharing your story for a future Monday Memories? You are more than welcome to! Email me at meg.sobuttons@gmail.com.

So...you may also like:
::Monday Memories 022: Andrea in China guest blogger #1.
::Monday Memories 023: Kari Turns 30! guest blogger #2.
::Monday Memories 024: Kelly's First Day of College guest blogger #3.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...16 Favorites

2011-04-16T07:00:00.000-07:00

01::the number 16.
02::new friends. welcome.
03::old friends.
04::my postcard making it halfway around the world.
05::a mini pirate. arr.
06::poetic asides PAD challenge
07::our love story.
08::the first slice of homemade bread right out of the oven. with butter.
09::girls' nights out.
10::honesty.
11::personalized mixes.
12::morning cuddles.
13::dancing with the girlies to Disney songs.
14::Second Daughter washing the dishes by herself.
15::small acts of kindness. they make a huge difference.
16::our new house.

So...you may also like:
::So...16 Favorites january.
::So...16 Favorites february.
::So...16 Favorites march.

Thanks for stopping by!

WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert

2011-04-15T08:47:00.000-07:00

"You Can Call Me Al" by Paul Simon
One of the few of his solo work that I actually do know well because 1) it is played at almost every sporting events, including our lowly Needham High football games, and 2) Chevy Chase is in the video and that always caught my attention. He's a funny guy!

Band #3 in concert.
I was bummed that it wasn't actually a Simon & Garfunkel reunion concert, but I was psyched to see Bob Dylan, since I was a fan of his as well.

So...you may also like:
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert aerosmith.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert allman brothers.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week bush.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Good For a Giggle

2011-04-14T06:00:00.000-07:00

Saw this commercial today and laughed SO HARD!
I had to rewind and watch it a couple of times.
It totally made my day.
Hope it makes yours.

So...you may also like:
::WSGMS Pick of the Week hilarious.
::So...In the Bag oh goodness.
::So...To A Four Year Old silly.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::02

2011-04-13T05:20:00.000-07:00

02::I am the mother.

I know this may sound silly, but this one took me a while to realize. In fact, I remember a specific moment when I was pregnant with Third Daughter {that's right, it took me a couple kids to figure this one out} while I was standing in the kitchen it hit me - "I am the mother of this family." And the thought was liberating.

I became a mother very young. {I was married at 20, mother at 21, two kids at 23, and three at 25} I was still trying to figure who I was, who I wanted to be, and how to be a grown up. I went from being a teenager - going to school, working, playing lacrosse, dating, having fun - to giving that all up and being a responsible, mature adult in a matter of months. It was a lot to take in and a lot to figure out. In fact, I'm still figuring that out.

Going through an identity crisis, or whatever you want to call it, while being a mother is not ideal. As a mother, you have little ones that rely on you. They rely on you to be consistent, reliable, supportive, secure; their leader. If I'm feeling insecure about who I am, imagine how they must feel.

But the good that came from being a mother while going through this soul-searching process, is the motivation they gave me to be better and to figure it out. The fact that they relied on me and looked up to me, gave me only one probable outcome - I needed to buck up, figure things out, and be what they needed me to be. And I wanted to be that.

As mother of this family, I need to know who I am, where I'm going, and what I'm teaching my children. I need {and want} to be very deliberate with my choices. There’s too much at stake for me to be wishy-washy.

There is much power in motherhood. A power that I needn’t ever take for granted. I have an incredible amount of power to do good and the same amount of power to do harm. Whether my kids realize or admit it, I am their world right now. I am who they look to to learn about life, about themselves, about right and wrong. There’s not a lot of room for slacking.

With power comes great responsibility. Now, I don’t always feel like I want this responsibility. There definitely are moments, or days, when I feel like it’s more than I can handle; my kids bug me; I don’t feel like being patient; or mature; I’m tired; I want everyone to leave me alone. But realizing that “I am the mother” puts into perspective how I need to be expressing those feelings and how I need to be handling those feelings.

How will my child feel when her mother tells her to leave her alone? How will she feel when her mother tells her she’s driving her nuts? How will she feel when her mother whines and cries about not being happy or not being able to do something she wants to do? I imagine she will feel devastated.

Am I perfect? Of course not. Will every mistake I make be detrimental? I hope not.

Like everything, I am working on keeping this perspective while interacting with my children.

I need to be the mother of this family.
I want to be.
I feel honored to be.
And I want to be a mother my kids are proud of.

So...you may also like:
::So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::01 everyone has limits.
::So...25::When I Love Them the Most after naps.
::So...Today i can be hormonal.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...To A Four Year Old

2011-04-12T07:00:00.000-07:00

To A Four Year Old

A fart's a work of art.
If you toot, it's a hoot.
Burp loud, and be proud.
Underwear? Definitely stare.
Pick your nose. Tickle toes.
Show your tummy - it's so funny!
Booger, bum,
Sticky gum.
These things are so silly!

Poetic Asides PAD Challenge: day five – “goofy poem”

So...you may also like:
::So...It Happens a poop story.
::Monday Memories 008: A Fine Mother Moment more poop. face it, poop is funny.
::So...Quotable :)

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 025: Casey's Twins

2011-04-11T07:13:00.000-07:00

I'm really excited to introduce you to my next guest blogger, Casey. She is another dear dear friend of mine and a woman I look up to and admire in so many ways. She is extremely thoughtful, full of class and style, a wonderful mother, and an extraordinary friend. She is one that I could talk to for hours, easily, and feel completely inspired and uplifted by the end.

Casey is a new blogger and I'm already a huge fan of her blog copper kettles. Check it out if you haven't already.

Hi all, I’m Casey and I’ve been a fan of Megan’s blog for a LONG time so I was super flattered when she asked me to guest post on this, my most favorite blog ever! I’m actually really new to the blogging world. Honestly, I think I’m only about a month old in blogging age. So, though being flattered, I felt a bit intimidated, too! It was like being asked to write the foreword in a reprint of your all-time favorite novel. Are you kidding me? However, I adore Megan and feel quite indebted to her for the way her words have inspired my everyday. It was, in fact, her blog and her just plain incredibleness that motivated me to start my own cyber-writings. So, thank you Megan … thank you for the thoughts, treats, music, quotes and memories you’ve shared – and here’s a memory of my own … for you (and well, I guess for anybody else who’s reading).

July 2006

I love this memory for so many reasons …
They were still so little … my first-borns
It was a breathtakingly beautiful day
In the town where I grew up
My mother’s garden was alive with activity and color
The air was warm and cloudless

We watched a small town parade …
Played in the fountains and sprinklers…
Ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner outside …
Watched the cows … Looked for rocks …
As I write I can almost feel the summer breeze,
And yet I feel still more – I see them
As they were

And I’m brought to wonder
What did they see?
What thoughts are behind those inquisitive stares?
Did they see me?
Did they wonder beyond the moment?
Were they awaiting their next adventure?
Were they aware that they were growing up?
Was I?

My first thought after reading this is that Casey is a poet! I love the feeling I had when I read this - like I was right there with her smelling the grass and feeling the warm summer breeze. Thank you so much Casey for sharing this memory and that adorable picture of your sweet twins.

Are you interested in sharing your story for a future Monday Memories? You are more than welcome to! Email me at meg.sobuttons@gmail.com.

So...you may also like:
::Monday Memories 022: Andrea in China guest blogger #1.
::Monday Memories 023: Kari Turns 30! guest blogger #2.
::Monday Memories 024: Kelly's First Day of College guest blogger #3.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Firework

2011-04-09T12:12:00.000-07:00

Baby you're a firework
Come on show them what you're worth.
-Katy Perry

So...you may also like:
::So...Becoming What You Want to Be diligence.
::So...A Little Stairway there's still time.
::So...Find Yourself to mothers.

Thanks for stopping by!

WSMGS Pick of the Week::In Concert

2011-04-08T08:46:00.000-07:00

"Melissa" by Allman Brothers
So smooth. It just feels like home.

Band #2 in concert.

So...you may also like:
::WSMGS Pick of the Week band #1.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week more allman bros.
::WSMGS Pick of the Week lenny kravitz.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...The Type of Person

2011-04-07T07:00:00.000-07:00

The Type of Person

I want to know who I am and who I want to be.
I want to always be striving to be the best me.
Reliable, honest, teachable, meek,
Trustworthy, praiseworthy - for these things I seek.
I want to uplift, encourage, serve, and share.
I want to show, not tell, how much I really care.
Thoughtful, faithful, careful, and kind,
Funny, happy, silly, refined.
I want to understand. I want to forgive.
I want to show my faith by the way that I live.
I want to be grateful and see joy all around me.
I want to be the person that I want to be.

Poetic Asides PAD Challenge: day four - "pick a type of person"

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::So...PAD fabulous, it is.
::So...Things That Are Making Me Happy PAD makes me happy.
::So... i did it! and i'll do it again!

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Good News Minute

2011-04-06T07:00:00.000-07:00

I'd like to take a minute {or two} to share some of my good news::

#1::we have unpacked lots of boxes. it feels really good. way better than packing.
#2::the mountain of empty boxes no longer resides in our entry way. {{sigh of relief}}
#3::we have successfully finished painting two rooms, and have picked colors for almost all of the other rooms. yay!
#4::today i did my first normal household chore! i cleaned the bathroom. and i never thought it could feel this good.
#5::i can park in my driveway. no more ginormous trailer. sweet.

We are loving our new house. It suits us nicely and I love dreaming about what it will become someday. It is very exciting {and a little weird} that I can actually picture my kids growing up in this house. Not that I'm anxious for anyone to grow up anytime soon, but I know it's bound to happen...

Now, who's gonna come and visit me?!

So...you may also like::
::So...The Move one month ago. crazy.
::Photo Ode to Our New Fire Pit gonna miss it.
::So...New & Improved Family Room so what if i'm decorating this house exactly the same?

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Seeing the Joy

2011-04-05T07:36:00.000-07:00

I have a confession. Remember this post? Well, let me tell you what really happened that day.

I was having one of those days. A day when I my kids were pushing me beyond my limits and I didn't have enough patience. A day of feeling like a terrible mother, with no motivation to be better. A day which I wanted to be over.

I sat down at my computer that afternoon to vent. I sat down and started furiously typing away about how hard it is to be a mother; how sometimes I just want a break; how I'm sick of doing everything for everyone; how no matter how hard I try I can't get my kids to listen to me; how I might just throw something if one more little person whines at me to do one more thing for them. And that's how that post started.

I typed and typed {and cried a bit}, took a deep exhale, and then concluded with "I love these girls." I sat there and stared at the screen. That was the truth. Even with all the other emotions exploding and flying all around, the bottom line is I love these girls.

And so I highlighted, and deleted. Everything except "I love these girls." And I went on from there. That is how that post was born, and many others like it.

I have gone back and forth with my feelings about blogging. This blog has evolved in the little over two years that it's been in existance and I think it has finally found it's purpose. To help me see the joy.

I've heard many complaints {and even felt the same myself at times} about how blogs aren't really reality. Sometimes it's exhausting and a bit annoying to read blogs that paint a "picture perfect" mother and/or family. Sometimes it is discouraging to read. Sometimes I react by thinking "that's not real life! Nobody's that happy and that perfect all the time!"

But I'm realizing that choosing to focus on the positive and uplifting instead of dwelling on the negative and discouraging, does not make you fake or dishonest - it shows your strength, faith, and determination to find joy in life. I really do believe that. And I am determined.

I'm sure there are people that read this blog and think I am fake. I'm sure there are people that think my life and thoughts as a mother are not realistic.

The truth is, I do not disclose everything I do, think, and say on this blog. I make plenty of mistakes and bad choices in what I do, think, and say. Everyday. I have plenty of moments when I whine, complain, cry, and yell. {Just ask my husband and friends} I have plenty of moments when I choose not to see the joy. But this is something I am trying to change.

I want to see the joy. I want to be positive, uplifting, and encouraging. I want to be happy. I want to show my faith in Jesus Christ by my actions. And I do believe I have the choice. Everyday I try. One choice at a time.

So...you may also like: ::So...Hope my faith brings me hope. ::So...Quotable i want to grow. ::So...Critical i want to notice the great things.

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 024: Kelly's First Day of College

2011-04-04T06:53:00.000-07:00

Kelly is a friend and former neighbor of mine {{sniff}} who I love and adore. She is a mother of three girls like me and I always feel like I have so much to talk about and relate to with her. She is a beautiful inside and out and so very real. I appreciate that so much! She is open and honest about the challenges of motherhood, but is dedicated to being a great mother, and she is. And on top of all that, she's an incredible athlete!

I love her blog At Full Capacity because she shares all the wonderful {and not so wonderful} things about the life as a mother. It is a daily read of mine.

August 1996 This is me…on the left. This picture was taken on my very first day of college moving into the dorms. My roomie (whom I’d just met for the first time) is on the right. It was in August 1996. Just typing that date it seems like ages ago, but really it feels like yesterday.

The summer after I graduated high school was a whirl wind! I was set to attend city college in the fall, but very last minute, a school I barely knew anything about contacted me. They offered me a cycling scholarship! So, change of plans! Within a couple of weeks I was on a plane headed half way across the country to Indianapolis with only two duffel bags and a couple of bikes. I had no idea what the next four years would bring.

So many emotions on that first day! Excited mainly…but nervous too. I remember I was so ready to start this new chapter in my life. I was craving independence. But now…as a mother to three girls…I can’t help but look at this picture through my mother’s eyes. She was with me that day…she took the picture. What was she going through?

I was running around all smiles completely oblivious that her heart was probably breaking. She flew to Indiana with me…spent a couple of days helping me get settled…and then got back on the plane alone. She had to let go. That was her job…to raise me the best she knew…and then let me go, and hope for the best.

The thought of letting my girls go terrifies me! Will I handle it with as much grace as my mother did? Or will I be a blubbering fool on their first day of college, sobbing into their shoulder.

Let’s hope not…for their sake.

Oh I just love this picture and this post. It's amazing how becoming a mother helps us get to know our own mothers better. I can totally relate to that!

Thank you, Kelly, for sharing a Monday Memory. It was fun to see a glimpse of you before I ever knew you!

Are you interested in sharing your story for a future Monday Memories? You are more than welcome to! Email me at meg.sobuttons@gmail.com.

So...you may also like:
::Monday Memories 023: Kari Turns 30 and mego is prego.
::Monday Memories 022: Andrea in China and is wearing a gorgeous dress.
::Monday Memories 002: Christmas Edition joy.

Thanks for stopping by!

So...Peace

2011-04-02T07:00:00.000-07:00

"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."

-John 14:27

So excited to listen to the Prophet and Apostles speak this weekend in General Conference. I am in need of some peace and know that I will find it by listening to and following their words.

Happy weekend everyone!

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WSMGS Pick of the Week: In Concert

2011-04-01T10:00:00.000-07:00

"Dream On" by Aerosmith
One of the best songs ever written.

Band #1 in concert.
Summer after my senior year, in Boston {their hometown} and it was incredible.

P.S. Happy April 2011 PAD Challenge! Let the poem-ing begin!
Oh! And another one of my postcards reached its destination. Mail is so fun.

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So...Waterfall in Maine

2011-03-31T07:48:00.000-07:00

Waterfall in Maine

Continuously running along veiny pathways;
Braided through birch and pine and oak;
Pouring your exhaustion into a pool of collected tears;
Protected by a maze of bodies with semi-permeable arms
That block the way to your hidden face.
Your mysterious beauty lay beneath layers of forest,
Gradually peeled away with each penetrating step I take.
A long kept secret stripped from your reflective black shield.
When my naked toe pierces through its membrane
Your cold clammy fingers tentatively wrap around me,
Forcefully tightening your grip, you pull me in.
My body enclosed by your overwhelming darkness
Tightens at the realization of inferiority.
You stare at me through your one way window
Blocking your soul with my reflection.
My eyes are left locked and speechless
At your humble omnipotence
Kept secret by your loving mother
Earth.

March 1999
written for 10th grade English
{image}

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So...Things I'm Learning Through Motherhood::01

2011-03-30T06:00:00.000-07:00

01::Everybody has limits.

When I was pregnant with First Daughter, I remember listening to "seasoned" mothers talk and joke about yelling at their kids. I couldn't relate. My mother yelled. I didn't want to yell. In fact, I couldn't even picture myself yelling. When I get mad, or overly stressed out, my first instinct is not to yell. It's to retreat. I could not picture myself yelling at my kids. I just wasn't a yeller.

The thing I didn't account for, is the fact that when I was pushed to my limit as a mother, and when I was mad or overly stressed out, I wouldn't have the luxury of retreating. In fact, it's right at that point - the breaking point - when the kids came at me full force. I was not prepared for this. And sad to say, I did react by yelling. And then I felt horrible. I do every time. And I now understand where those mothers were coming from, including my own.

It's important to realize and remember that everyone has limits. Not everyone reacts by yelling - some cry, some laugh, some run away, some stuff their faces with food, some do all of the above {like me}. Even if you haven't been pushed to your limits yet and don't know where or what they are, everyone has them. Even you.

And I'm here to tell you, motherhood will push you to those limits, and some. It will be hard, but it is wonderful. And it will make you grow.

I absolutely believe that our children are chosen and given specifically to us. A custom fit to challenge us in the just the way we need - not too much, not too little. Although sometimes it feels like more than I can handle, I am comforted to know that I have not been given more than I can bear.

A very wise friend once told me that God does not make mistakes when placing children with parents. We each have a set of strengths and weaknesses and placed together we are what the other needs. Even if that means that we are their challenge - what they need to become the person they can be. Sometimes that is hard for me to swallow, but I feel like it is true.

My greatest fear as a mother is that I will be a burden in my child's life - that I will somehow make her life harder. But what if I'm meant to? What if I am the challenge she needs to become a stronger person and reach her potential? Am I willing to fill that role?

I hope that is not the plan for me as a mother. I hope that I am not meant to be a burden or a challenge in my daughters' lives. But I know that they are meant to be a burden and challenge in my life, but in the very best of ways. They challenge me to be better than I am. They push to my limits and stretch me a little further. They test me every day and give me opportunities to prove that I can be better.

Reaching and realizing limits is not a bad thing. This is what I have learned. At first I was devastated to know that my limits were not as far away as I thought. But over time, I have recognized clearly where those limits are, have learned to be honest with myself about them and how I deal with them, and now I am working on preparing myself before I reach my limit so I can choose my reaction instead of being a victim to it. I have not yet mastered this, but I am working on it.

It's always easier to know how to react when not in the moment. Most times the moment has past before I even recognize how I am feeling and reacting. But sometimes I get it and that feels really good.

And I find strength and comfort in the wise words of my Grandma Bonita. Oh how I wish she was still just a phone call away.

P.S. Nadine received my postcard yesterday, which makes me very happy. So does that picture of Second Daughter sitting in an ocean of flowers. Where are you Spring?

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So...What We Did on St. Patty's

2011-03-29T13:45:00.000-07:00

The girls woke up the morning of St. Patrick's Day to a trail of "gold" leading them down the hallway, down the stairs, and into the kitchen, where they found this:

The leprechauns must have known they didn't have any green to wear that day.
Lucky for the girls - ohterwise they would've been pinched!

We had green shamrock pancakes for breakfast {which nobody ate...}

and beef stew for dinner {cornbeef and cabbage scares me a little bit...}

and of course - green bread!

The leprechauns even turned all our milk green like they do every year
Which had interesting effects on the kids' digestive systems.

Second Daughter even came out of the bathroom the next day saying, "Mom! The leprechauns even turned my --------- green!"
{{lol}}

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Monday Memories 023: Kari Turns 30

2011-03-28T07:00:00.000-07:00

This week's guest blogger is a dear dear friend of mine, Kari. I feel like we were meant to be friends. We rented condos next to each other, then bought houses across the river from each other, and now our daughters are in the same Kindergarten class. I hope our lives stay connected as they have because I appreciate her friendship so much.

Kari has a private family blog, so no link today, but hers is one I read faithfully. I love how reflective she is on life, motherhood, and faith. She inspires me in so many ways and I'm so glad she agreed to share a Monday Memory with me!

May I introduce, Kari::

March, 2009 I have to admit that when Megan asked me to guest blog for her Monday Memories… I was super excited and super nervous at the same time. I have a blog but its private so my ramblings are just that… private-or semi-private I guess.

The only people who read my blog are close friends and family. With the prospect of writing publicly I immediately wondered what my catch would be. Will I be witty? Will I be sincere? Will I be cool or awkward or embarrassing?? After talking with Megan, I am going with honesty and just being myself. Because I know how to do that.

I picked this picture/memory because it happens to be one of my favorites. Not because I think it’s an amazing picture but because it’s one of my favorite people and one of my favorite days.

This is on my 30th birthday. A lot of people have issues with getting old. Not me. Especially my 30th birthday. It was a defining moment for me. It was a turning point for me with a lot of private issues. It celebrated a moment for me that reminded me how grateful I am to be alive and encouraged me to continue to work harder so I can stick around.

I was very happy this day—which my husband likes to point out he wasn’t even in town. Just a coincidence he had to be out of town on business. I invited all of my closest friends and siblings (one came in from out of town) to celebrate with me. One of whom is this beautiful lady. She was very round and ripe with pregnancy. I LOVE watching my friend’s blossom with pregnancy. They are beautiful and radiant with the life inside them. Does anyone think this about themselves WHILE they are pregnant? Probably not, but I do appreciate the pictures of myself pregnant AFTER being pregnant.

Megan has been such a good example to me since we met in 2005. She continues to teach me things about myself especially in the gift of Motherhood. She is a great Mother. I know she questions it sometimes… I do too. I would imagine we all question ourselves on a regular basis. But that probably is what helps us to grow. It’s the season I am in. I love this season. I love rubbing baby tummies, nursing my little one, getting up at nights with nightmares and soothing upset children back to sleep.

A friend asked me recently what my identity was? I wasn’t sure how to answer that. I appreciated my husbands list for me:

Child of God Woman Daughter Sister Wife Best Friend Mother Provider Nurturer Teacher Comforter Listener Caretaker Chef Gardener HandyWoman

When I look back at this picture, I can see all of these in my friend… and if I give myself credit… in myself. Megan gave me a little plant from IKEA as gift. It still sits in my kitchen. When I look at it I always think back to this great day and it continues to give me encouragement to do a little better each day.

Finally… kind of a side notes…

1. The desserts on the far left of the picture… They were DIVINE! Butter yellow cake, white chocolate ganache, whipped creamy buttercream frosting with fresh strawberries… little cakelets.. mmmmmmm………..

2. My pre-pregnancy GAP jeans. So cute. Don’t care if I get back into them, but they were super cute.

3. Peeps on top of the microwave… somebody (Wendy-SIL) loves me. However, they have to get kind of stale before they need to be eaten.

4. 13 going on 30 was going on in the background. 30, Flirty and Thriving. :) It became my motto for the year. (Only flirty with the hubby.. of course ;) )

And my sidenote:: 5. LOVE that I have the ever-food-stained-belly. Oh goodness me...

I love love LOVE the memory your chose Kari. And I love the list you shared with us - it fits you perfectly. Thank you so much for sharing! I too had so much fun that night. Nothing like friend birthday parties for big girls. And it was a miracle that I got up out of that LoveSac that night :)

Are you interested in sharing your story for a future Monday Memories? You are more than welcome to! Email me at meg.sobuttons@gmail.com

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So...Lessons to Learn

2011-03-26T13:36:00.000-07:00

"We all have the same lessons to learn in life, we just learn them in different ways."

-Erica

Possibly the best words of wisdom I have heard in a very long time, and exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks for talking and sharing with me, Erica. I appreciate your friendship more than you know.

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So...Heart Strings

2011-03-25T06:06:00.000-07:00

I'm so in love with music.
In all its colors, shapes, and sizes.
It speaks deeply to my soul.
It makes me feel alive.

Someday I dream of playing in a symphony again.
Hands down one of my most favorite things to do.
There's nothing that compares to that experience.
I crave it.

Just looking at a string instrument - not exclusively a violin - inspires me.
Like these beautiful basses perfectly lined up on the stand.
A tug on my heart strings.

I love to play, and want to more than I do.
Someday...

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So...Our Love Story

2011-03-24T06:30:00.000-07:00

{running through sprinklers 2003}

Our love story is being feautured today over at Social Butterfly.

Head on over to read how Husband & I met and fell in love.

I love Amber's idea of compiling and sharing love stories on her blog.

Like her, I'm a sucker for a good love story.

And while you're there, check out her postcard swap.

Such a fun idea.

Who doesn't like to get mail?

And mail with a pretty picture on it...Yes, please.

Thanks Amber!

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So...Best Mix EVER

2011-03-23T07:00:00.000-07:00

I label all my burned CDs with a sharpy.
This one is labeled "Best Mix EVER."

Patience::Guns N Roses
Dream On::Aerosmith
Crazy On You::Heart
Fortunate Son::Creedence Clearwater Revival
Tuesday's Gone::Lynard Skynard
Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds::The Beatles
The Boxer::Simon & Garfunkel
Cashmire::Led Zepplin
Born To Run::Bruce Springstein
Last Dance With Mary Jane::Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
Take A Walk on The Wild Side::Lou Reed
Ramblin Man::Allman Brothers
Beast of Burden::The Rolling Stones
Wish You Were Here::Pink Floyd

I have to admit, it is a good one.
Some of my most favorite songs from some of my most favorite bands.
Each one of these bands has an album I can listen to start to finish.

Even though I am currently a high schooler at heart, these songs are what I really listened to in high school.
See, I used to be pretty cool. I swear. Once upon a time.

In fact, I saw five of these bands in concert.
Any guess which five?

Oh, and...who wants a copy?

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So...D.E.A.R.

2011-03-22T06:00:00.000-07:00

Drop Everything And Read

This book is an example of how much I love my daughters.

We went to the library to check out some more Magic Treehouse books. The next one in the series wasn't available. Located just one shelf away were millions and millions of Rainbow Magic fairy books. Literally millions.

First Daughter begged and begged. I was hesitant. Mostly because I wanted to stick to a series I knew both Daughters enjoyed. Partly because they looked stupid. I totally judged this book by the cover. Guilty as charged. And rightfully so.

We read #1::India the Moonstone Fairy and #2::Scarlett the Garnet Fairy. Both were pretty dumb. But they are about fairies and jewels and all things girl and so First Daughter loves them. Therefore, Second Daughter loves them too. Or so she says.

Second Daughter actually had a harder time following these books than others we've read. She was pretty distracted and not too interested while I was reading. Honestly, I was pretty distracted myself. I put myself in auto-read mode to try and get through it. It was slightly painful.

Something tells me though that we will keep reading these doozies. At least the rest of the Jewel Fairies series. Luckily, there are all sorts of types of fairies that have their own series as well. Oh joy.

Like I said...I love my daughters.

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Monday Memories 022: Andrea in China

2011-03-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

Since our move, our home server has been out of order. This means I have no access to any of our photos {boo!}. Monday Memories are a bit tricky without the old photos. So...I have decided to call on some of my friends/fellow bloggers/favorite writers to write up some guest posts for me. I'm actually really excited about this. I've never had guest bloggers before and I'm excited to read what they come up with. I'm a succor for a good story - especially one that has a picture to go with it. First up, Andrea! Andrea is Husband's cousin and I love her dearly. She is so sweet, positive, and fun to be around. Andrea's family moved to China when she was a junior in high school. I'm sure that wasn't an easy thing to do, but from everything I've heard from her and from her family, they had an incredible experience. I loved seeing her pictures on her blog and on facebook during that time. Now, Andrea's family is back in the U.S. and she is attending BYU here in Provo. We get to see Andrea every so often and I always look forward to it. She's a very talented photographer and I'm excited for her to take pictures of my kiddos someday. Oh, and if you don't already know, Andrea is the baby whisperer. She has an amazing gift with children. They all LOVE her. Andrea's in the brown dress {which I love!} on the right. May 2008 So...my name is Andrea, and Megan is my wonderful cousin. She has asked me to write a guest post for her Monday Memories and I am very honored that she would want ME to write something on her blog! Between the years of 2006 and 2008 I created so many incredible memories because I spent that time living in China, so it was really hard to find one picture that would represent one memory. This particular picture is from May 2008, and it is of me and my senior class, some of my best friends in China. This picture represents more to me than just our Senior Prom night; this picture represents so many memories and so much love that I have for these six people. That year the seven of us created so many memories together, from sitting on the couches in our high school doing our online classes, to our Senior Seminar class, where we researched world problems and then presented well thought out presentations on how these problems affected the world, and from biking through the jungles of Malaysia and hanging out on Survivor Island, to this night, our Senior Prom, the night every high school senior dreams about. I relive those memories every time I see this picture of us together at the end of an incredible year. These six amazing individuals changed my life, and I will always remember that year, and all the memories that we shared. Thank you so much Andrea! I was hoping you would pick something from your time in China. What an amazing experience! Are you interested in sharing your story for a future Monday Memories? You are more than welcome to! Email me at meg.sobuttons@gmail.com So...you may also like: ::Monday Memories 007: Missionary Bro what my college brother is doing. ::Monday Memories 006: Summer Lovin' back in my college days. ::Monday Memories it begins. Thanks for stopping by!

So...Squeeze It

2011-03-19T10:25:00.000-07:00

"If you don't squeeze it, no one else will."

- Katie Smith, instructer @ 24 Hour Fitness

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WSMGS Pick of the Week

2011-03-18T13:19:00.000-07:00

"Machine Head" by Bush
This song is eighth grade for me.

In order to know me, it is imperative that you know the past I have with this band.
It's kinda funny - I know - but fifteen years ago, this was my reality.

I still get excited just hearing the opening riff - like giddy excited.

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So...In The Bag

2011-03-18T06:00:00.000-07:00

I've never been a very tidy person.
Cleaning always has, and still is, a chore.

I try really hard to keep my house clean.
I prefer my house to be clean and tidy and orderly.
It helps to reduce stress, and so I try.
Sometimes I do an OK job.

But there are two places that never are clean.
1::my car.
2::my purse.

Today I cleaned out my purse.

If it's true that you can tell a lot about a woman from what's in her purse, I'm not sure what this says about me... {my purse loving friends are probably going to question our friendship right about now}

This is what I found -

::1 pair of mittens
::2 hats
::wallet
::phone
::2 magazines
::2 old shopping lists
::2 tampons
::lots of crumpled receipts
::lip gloss {I was looking everywhere for this!!!}
::2 pair of socks
::1 book
::headband
::pampered chef chip clips
::expired coupons
::old perscription {never filled}
::recipe for pumpkin choc. chip muffins
::flower pin
::toy butterfly
::3 squishies
::2 rocks
::broken crayons
::pen
::22 cents
::crumbs
::matchbox car
::six small toy animals {cow, sheep, dog, lion, moose, pig}
::lots of changes and misc. things stuck under the lining of the purse {???!!!}

I felt like Marry Poppins with her bottomless carpet bag.
All I need is a lamp.

I don't think I need to say that most of the things were removed from my bag and transferred to the garbage.

This is all that's left::

Besides the jingling of random change that I can't remove from the lining of my purse, I feel like a new woman carrying my organized {and much lighter} purse.

Now I'm good for a few days until my purse gets trashed again.
Then it's survival mode until next year when I clean it out again.

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So...Siddartha

2011-03-17T06:00:00.000-07:00

Siddartha. One of my favorite books.

I read it for the first time in my high school junior English class. I loved it then.

I read it again in 2007. I loved it then too.

Thanksgiving day, my cousin asked me why I loved it. She had read it because she knew I loved it, and was curious why it was a favorite of mine. I couldn't remember. I just remembered I loved it.

Last week I read it again. And I still love it.

Siddartha is the story of a man's journey to find himself - to find Zen. He realizes that he cannot rely on the teachings of others. In order for him to learn, he needed to experience.

After reading it again, and trying to remember why I loved it so much, I realized that I loved this book for different reasons each time I read it.

When I first read it, I was in the "I need to find out for myself who I am and what I believe" phase of life. I was exploring and searching and trying to find my independence - in action, thought, and belief. Siddartha inspired me. His journey was lonely, but it was necessary. That is how I felt at sixteen.

"Many people have to change a great deal and wear all sorts of clothes." -Siddartha p.114

When I read it for the second time, I again was in a soul-searching stage of life. I had just had Second Daughter. I was suffering from postpartum depression. I was having a bit of an identity crisis. Once again, I was trying to find myself. It felt like everything I knew about myself and about my life had been turned upside down. I was frantically searching for something to grab on to, to pull my head back above water. Once again, Siddartha inspired me. He showed courage and determination on his quest to find peace. He did what he needed to do. He recognized his strengths, and he used them to accomplish his goals.

"Everyone can reach his goal, if he can think, wait, and fast." -Siddartha p.50

This time, I read Siddartha in a different state of mind. This time, I was not so desperate to find any answers. This time, I just read it. And again, Siddartha inspired me.

"When someone is seeking...it happens quite easily that he only sees the thing that he is seeking; that he is unable to find anything, unable to absorb anything, because he is only thinking of the thing he is seeking, because he has a goal, because he is obsessed with his goal. Seeking means to have a goal; but finding mean to be free, to be receptive, to have no goal." -Siddartha p.113

For the record, there is one thing I don't agree with in Siddartha. I do not believe that one must experience everything in order to find one's self. Example:: I do not believe that destructive behavior is needed to understand productive behavior. I do not believe that you have to experience in order to learn. Yes, there is a different understanding that comes through experience, but it is not necessary.

Unlike Siddartha, I believe there is much value in learning from the experiences and teachings of others, especially when it comes to avoiding sorrow, pain, and destruction. However, I do believe that there is much value to learn from various lifestyles and from those that are different from us.

Ok, that's all I have to say about that.

I recommend reading Siddartha.

It's a pretty quick read and still one of my favs.

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So...16 Favorites

2011-03-16T05:04:00.000-07:00

01::scheduled posts lined up in a row.
02::books about writing.
03::writing about writing.
04::old friends that are still around.
05::celebrating two kiddos birthdays.
06::falling back in love with blogging.
07::budding tulips.
08::hearing an old favorite song on the radio.
09::quiet time alone in the house.
10::sleeping in sweatpants.
11::fireplaces.
12::red mango.
13::the way Third Daughter says, "Peese, Mom-mom."
14::a king sized bed
15::dreaming of springtime.
16::moving into a new house.

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So...Mommy Next To Her Baby

2011-03-15T07:05:00.000-07:00

I tiptoe down the hallway
to the playroom and peek my head in.
I like to watch you in your world
with your ponies all in a row.
You talk to them in your small sweet voice
and gently place them one by one
so carefully. I'm not ready for you to know
I'm here. For now
I just want to watch
long enough to breathe in this moment
so I can remember.
You must have felt my eyes watching
because you look up at me
with your beaming eyes and cheeks
that always melt me.
You wave me over and show me a seat
right next to you so I can play ponies too.
The game is to line them up one by one
on the armrest of the futon
and then to watch.
I place the mommy next to her baby.
Then I feel your head rest gently
on the side of my arm.
While we watch.

April 18, 2009
Poetic Asides PAD: Day 18 - interaction poem.

Happy Birthday Second Daughter!

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Monday Memories 021: Second Daughter

2011-03-14T06:00:00.000-07:00

Getting to know each other.
April 2007

This week we celebrate Second Daughter's Birthday. She is three whole years old!

Wait a second, she's four.
Oh my. She's four.

Second Daughter brings so much joy into our family and to everyone she meets. She is a light. She's cute as a button and I love her to pieces.

I'd be lying if I said that the transition from one to two kids was easy for me. It wasn't. I have very mixed emotions when I look at photos from 2007. Mostly because I wish that I was so much more for my girls than I was. But I was struggling, and I was learning, and luckily we got through it without too much damage done. Everything has worked out just fine.

Even though it was a difficult time for me, every moment of Second Daughter's life has been a gift. I abolutely feel blessed to be her mother. Sometimes I can't help but stare at her and wonder why I'm so lucky to be her mom.

She is a ball of fun. She loves to make friends and is very concerned about everyone's happiness. She loves to snuggle and I love this too. Every night she asks me to sleep in her bed with her. Although I say no, I secretly want to say yes. Every night. She loves to tell jokes and to be silly, but lately she's concerned about people laughing at her. She is "a goofball," as she calls herself, "because Goofy's a goofball." :0)

Oh how I love this sweet girl!

She gives of her love so generously and brightens our home with her smile and giggles.

I am so proud of her and the great girl that she is. She is a wonderful sister. Our Little Middle. She loves to play and she loves to sing. But if she had her way, she would paint all day long.

I'm excited to celebrate her this week. I wish I could take her to Disneyland like she requested, but we'll just have to settle for a trip to the Disney Store. I think she will like that.

Happy Birthday this week, sweet daughter of mine.
I hope you never ever change, and always want to cuddle.

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Thanks for stopping by!

So...Learning vs. Improving

2011-03-12T08:24:00.000-08:00

"If we find ourselves "learning" about writing, but not producing an improved outcome, then we are practicing self-deception. We are trading the feeling of learning for the good feeling of actually improving."

- Caleb Warnock

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WSMGS Pick of the Week

2011-03-11T15:15:00.000-08:00

"Only One" by Yellowcard
Where in the world has Yellowcard been?

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So...You Speak

2011-03-11T07:53:00.000-08:00

you don’t need to speak
you already tell me so much
you raise your eyebrows to say hello
you open your eyes wide to say you like it
you reach your arms to be held
you flap to show excitement
you suck on your fingers when you’re tired
you wiggle your toes when you want to snuggle
you babble “da da” when you want to play
you clap your hands when you hear us sing
you rock back and forth to say you’re ready
you softly grunt when you want some more
you speak the loudest when
you press your forehead to mine
you smile so sweetly to say
you love me.

November 23, 2009
Poetic Asides November PAD Chapbook Challenge Day 23: poem filled with noise.

Happy Birthday Third Daughter!

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So...Our Very Own Magic Tree House

2011-03-10T07:00:00.000-08:00

The kiddos have been playing Magic Tree House in our backyard.

They collect all our chapter books and pile them in the tree house. They climb up the ladder, open up the books, zoom down the slide, and run around the backyard reenacting the adventures of Jack and Annie.

It makes my heart feel happy.

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So...Projects in the Works

2011-03-09T06:00:00.000-08:00

::I've been brainstorming a new blogging project for a little over a year now. Debating whether or not to finally take the plunge. As if I need another blog in my life. But I am excited about my little idea and can get carried away thinking of all the possibilities.

::Trying my darnedest to get a writing project going. I have a few ideas storming away in my brain, but nothing down to take off running with. I'm overflowing with desire and intentions but lacking in results. Just fragments. But I do believe that one of these days it will all come together. I do. I really do.

::Daydreaming about projects in our new home. Attempting to prioritize and thinking realistically about timing. It all can't happen at once. I might be most excited about the Daughters' room, that may or may not feature this shot.

::Considering Project::Playdays. No electronics required. Or allowed. We have been spending too much time infront of the TV and the computer and it's time to take some action. I may be the most excited about this one.

::Compiling a Learning Letters book for the kiddos. Of course this requires us to finish M-Z. Perhaps we should get on that...one of these days. {For the record - I found this concept/idea on No Time For Flashcards}

::Making a file of pictures to print for Third Daughter's baby book. After all, this is the year to start and finish it. I can't wait.

What are you working on this winter?
Any projects lined up for Spring?

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So...Some Favorite Blogs

2011-03-08T08:48:00.000-08:00

I am pleased to introduce to you the people I spend the most time reading online.
Some of them I know.
Some of them I don't.
All of them inspire me in some way or another and I just thought I'd share.

::Sherbet Blossom::hannah inspired me to start my own blog and continues to encourage me.
::Ginger Unplugged::my friend, neighbor, and writer, ginger. she is clever, whitty, and inspiring. i love reading anything she writes.
::At Full Capacity::my friend kelly shares a very honest, unapologetic, can't-help-but-laugh-sometimes perspective to motherhood and family life.
::marta writes::marta has a gift for writing and expressing the joys of life as a mother.
::nienie::who isn't inspired by nienie?
::Bee a Little Better::very new blog. dedicated to all things uplifting and to being a little better. i have a feeling i'm going to love this.
::the would-be writers guild::tiffany just makes me laugh. and i like it.
::Travelin' Oma::marty has a gift for writing and i'm inspired by her passion.
::Poetic Asides::i love the community of poets i have found here. even though i'm a baby in the world of poetry, they always make me feel welcome.
::My Name is Not Bob::robert's other blog. full of great advice for writer's and poets.
::Presley Fam::i stumbled across this blog and am so inspired by this family.
::House of Smith's::super cute shelley is an old old friend who has an amazing gift for all things creative. which is a major understatement. i love seeing what she's working on.
::willette::host of the joy of love class i took in february.

There are many other friends and family blogs that I read and love.
This list a just a few of my favs.

What are some of your favorite blogs?
Is there one out there that needs to be on my list?
Please, do let me know.

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::So...New Favorite tiffany, i don't know you, but i love you. but not in a creepy way. i promise.

Thanks for stopping by!

Monday Memories 020: Third Daughter

2011-03-07T20:51:00.000-08:00

March, 2009
I became a mother to three.
Girls.

Third Daughter's birth was a scheduled induction. We were trying to avoid her sharing a birthday with Second Daughter. We wanted to make sure she was born before my mom flew in from Boston a few days later. On top of that, I wanted to make sure my doctor was the one to deliver her. After all, he had delivered the other two. When doc presented the option to induce, I took it.

I dropped First and Second Daughter off at my cousin's house the night before the induction. I cried the whole way home.

I kept thinking about how everything was going to be different the next time I saw them. Again, I worried how our relationships would change. All I wanted was to spend my last moments as a mother of two snuggled up and rocking in the big blue chair, whispering in their ears how much I loved them. I wanted to make sure they knew that nothing - not even a brand new, adorably irresistible baby - would change that.

We arrived at the hospital at 6:00 am. I immediately was given an epidural and started on pitocin. I assumed the delivery would be fast. I had been induced with my first {14 hours} and my second came so fast {3 1/2 hours - no induction}. I figured the third time around would be even faster. I was wrong.

At 5:00 pm I was still sitting and waiting. Husband and I were so bored all day. Like I said, we thought it would be fast. We didn't plan anything to pass the time. This was not smart.

At 5:30 pm, the nurse came to check on me. I still was only 5 cm dilated. No less than a minute after she left I felt things change drastically. It was then I remember how fast things progressed toward the end of my first birth {also an induction}. I knew she was coming fast. I paged the nurse who said she was sure we had some time. I assured her we didn't.

At 5:40 pm, the doctor arrived. Five minutes and two pushed later, Third Daughter was born. It was just as much a miracle as the First and Second. And I was just as emotional.

There is no way to describe how it feels to bring a child into the world. There is no way to express the amount of love - for the child, for my husband, for & from Heavenly Father - that is felt in that moment right after birth. There is no way to explain how everything happens so fast, and yet time stands still, when that baby is placed in your arms. There just is no way.

The only word that comes to mind is JOY.
Becoming a mother - whether for the first, second, or third time - is pure joy.

I absolutely love being a mother to three girls. I feel extremely blessed. All three of my daughters are gifts.

Third Daughter has always been my angel baby. I couldn't have asked for a better third child. She fit right into our family like she always has been here. I'm pretty sure she has.

She is full of so much personality. She is tender hearted. She is loving and snuggly. She loves it when we are all together as a family - especially for a family hug. She brings so much happiness and joy into my life. I love her to pieces.

I can hardly believe that my third baby girl will be two this week. I just want her to stay like this forever.

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So...Courage

2011-03-05T09:48:00.000-08:00

It takes courage to be who you want to be.

Be courageous.

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WSMGS Pick of the Week

2011-03-04T09:00:00.000-08:00

"Bootylicious" by Destiny's Child
I think it's self explanitory :0)

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So...D.E.A.R.

2011-03-04T06:17:00.000-08:00

Drop Everything And Read

Second Daughter and I just finished Disney Princess Collection. This is the first "chapter book" that Second Daughter and I have read just the two of us.

We read one story every day before her nap and it was something that we both looked forward to.

This collection has the classic stories of the Disney Princesses, as well as some new stories starring the same familiar princesses.

It was perfect for Second Daughter because the stories and characters were very familiar to her. There was a picture on every page for her to look at while I read which was also a bonus.

I worried for a while about not spending as much time reading with Second Daughter as I did with First Daughter. I worried that she wouldn't develop the same love for reading as First Daughter has. I worried that she wouldn't have the same imagination, language, and reading skills as First Daughter.

I was wrong.
She has caught up just fine and loves story time as much as First Daughter does.
Good thing too, because D.E.A.R. time is one of my favorite ways to spend time with the kiddos. Another ploy to get some extra snuggles in.

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So...Always Your Mama

2011-03-03T08:26:00.000-08:00

I just want to hold you.
I want to hug you and love you
Tell you that everything will be ok
Tell you that I love you
Tell you that even though everything is changing
Nothing will.
You still are my baby
And I’m always your mama.

I just want to hold you.
I want to rock you,
Feel the weight of your head and arms draped on my shoulder,
Whisper how much I love you,
Listen to you breathing
Heavy and steady,
Brush my lips across your forehead, nose, and soft warm cheek.
I love you more than you know.
I love you more than I can show.

I just want to hold you.

March 20, 2009

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So...Love

2011-03-02T08:32:00.000-08:00

My life is a gift
My life has a plan
My life has a purpose
In heav'n it began.
My choice was to come
To the lovely home on Earth
And seek for God's light
To direct me from birth.

I will follow God's plan for me
Holding fast to His word and His love.
I will work
And I will pray
I will always walk in His way
And I will be happy on Earth
And in my home above.

Almost-four-year-old Second Daughter sang this song Monday night for her family home evening lesson. Just one example of how the Lord showed me how much He loves me that day.

I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me. I know Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ know and love me, but I never cease to be overwhelmed by the moments, or days, that remind how much they really do. And that they really do.

I am so incredibly thankful for so many wonderful people in my life. The Lord has been able to send His love to me through them.

God is good. God is love. And I am so thankful.

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So...28::Future

2011-03-01T16:12:00.000-08:00

::the help. the future of my housework is looking bright. :0)

Recently it is not uncommon that I find Second Daughter washing the dishes by hand with hand soap. She pulls the stool up to the sink, turns on the water, and scrubs away.

She is very sweet. I am thankful for her and her kind, helping heart.

P.S. Thanks for hangin' in there with me through the joy of LOVE project. I had so much fun taking these pictures and I learned a thing or two through the process. I'm so glad to have these pictures - I know I wouldn't have taken them otherwise. It's a little piece of our life to add to the journal. Yay for that.

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So...The Move

2011-03-01T06:54:00.000-08:00

We've been cleaning up and cleaning out over here, getting ready to move. And you know what? I like my house without so much stuff in it.

It's amazing how little we actually can live with. Makes me wonder if I ever will actually unpack those boxes.

We're packing up ship to set sail down the street. That's right, we are moving into another house in our neighborhood. That's how much we love where we live. We feel like we've found a little piece of heaven tucked away right here for us in a secret corner of Provo, UT. Of all places.

We've been here for five years and have absolutely love it. Moving into a bigger house on the block will hopefully ensure that we're here for the long haul. Or at least a long-er haul.

It's bitter-sweet thinking about the move. I'm not sure I'm ready to leave this house. I love it. It's cute. It's cozy. It's perfect. And on top of that, it's in a cul-de-sac.

As excited as I am to have more space and be in a more permanent home, I will miss this first little house of ours. It's been our home, full of so many precious memories.

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Monday Memories 019: Winter Outing

2011-02-28T06:00:00.000-08:00

January 2007, BYU duck pond.

It's right about this time of year that we all get a bit stir-crazy around here. Ok, maybe we have been for a couple months now. Is it a coincidence that I average two posts per day in the month of February? I think not.

I usually am reluctant to take the kiddos on an outdoor outing during the cold winter months, mostly just because I'm cold. But I can honestly say that every time we do, I'm so glad we did. We really should do it more often.

I love winter walks. I love winter trips to the park. I love winter visits to the duck pond like the one I took with First Daughter back in 2007. The ducks were extra hungry and thrilled to have visitors. They even swarmed. It was a bit alarming, but it was really fun. We laughed a lot. First Daughter didn't seem to mind her red, runny nose and frozen fingers one little bit.

The truth of it is the kiddos love playing outside, even in the cold. All it takes is a couple extra layers {which usually end up coming off anyway}. I must remember this for the remainder of our cold season. That may just be how we make it through to springtime.

Perhaps we will plan another trip to the BYU duck pond. We are due for a visit.

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So...Set 3

2011-02-27T19:59:00.000-08:00

I have had two great weeks at the gym.
Hallelujah! Have I ever needed it.

I'm realizing that I am not a big fan of 3WeekWorkouts. I don't think three weeks is long enough. Even if I made it to the gym everyday for those three weeks, I don't think it's enough. I would have liked some more time.

Alas, I will continue the 3WeekWorkout for one more set. Yes, I will finish what I started.

3WeekWorkout - Set 3::

And for the record - swimming is hard. It was hard to swim laps for longer than 10 minutes. I am not an experienced swimmer, that's for sure. But it was fun to try something new.

Happy exercising!

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So...27::What They Say

2011-02-27T16:05:00.001-08:00

::three squeezes says "i love you."

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So...26::Bromance

2011-02-26T18:17:00.001-08:00

bromance, -noun 1. Describes the complicated love and affection shared by two straight males.

This was another tricky assignment.
Husband doesn't love me taking his picture.
Plus, the object of his bromance lives too far away for a photo op today.

So...I had to settle with playing around in photoshop with an old photo.

::in the words of Husband, "man, I miss that guy."

Jono, why are you so red?

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So...Aladdin's Lamp

2011-02-26T09:45:00.000-08:00

"the past is an Aladdin's lamp which [the personal essayist] never tires of rubbing."

-Phillip Lopate

So true, Mr. Lopate...So true...

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So...25::When I Love Them The Most

2011-02-25T18:23:00.000-08:00

This assignment was tough for me.
It was hard to pin point when I love them the most.
It was even harder to figure out how to shoot it. Tricky tricky.

I'm not sure if this is when I love Third Daughter the most, but it sure is one of my favorite versions of her.

::after naps.

Because::

::she has glazed eyes

::and rosy cheeks.

::she gives me lots of kisses. {this may or may not be her payment to get out of the crib.}

::she pretends she can't see me.

::she pretends I can't see her.

::she's extra cuddly and lovable and ready to snuggle mom-mom.

I'm sure you can see why I love this.

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WSMGS Pick of the Week

2011-02-25T10:00:00.000-08:00

"The Climb" by No Doubt
The song still rocks my world.
Great music. Great lyrics. Great message.

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So...07.2::Generations

2011-02-25T06:49:00.000-08:00

Finally got up to visit Grandma Joy.
Oh how we love her!

The girls had a great time looking through old photo albums with her and listening to her stories.
What a treat.

::with Great-Grandma Joy.

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So...24::Where

2011-02-24T12:03:00.001-08:00

::the bridge where he proposed. eight years ago this month.

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So...If Only Then

2011-02-24T06:00:00.000-08:00

One of these days I’ll write it all
and paint the masterpiece it already is
in my mind. I’ll write how he knew me;
he saw me like no one ever has;
“we connect on an unfairly awesome level,”
– what does that even mean?
Our story needs to be told, but how?
is what’s holding me back, from telling
our story and writing it all down.

Poetic Asides Wednesday Prompt: one of these days

P.S. I'm taking a writing class finally! Maybe I'll actually get more down than fragments and poems. Here's to hoping...

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So...23::Facebook

2011-02-23T11:18:00.000-08:00

My favorite photos of those I love found on facebook::

::Husband on the lake {pre-kids. :0)}

::by the Boston Hah-bah

::saving it for later.

::melt my heart.

::most favorite. hands down.

I'm thinking this might be good material for Monday Memories.

Are we friends yet on facebook?
We should be.

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So...A Playlist

2011-02-23T06:00:00.001-08:00

Bring Me to Life::Evanescence
I Don't Wanna Be::Gavin DeGraw
All Around Me::Flyleaf
When I Look At You::Miley Cyrus
Undiscovered::Ashlee Simpson
The Reason::Hoobastank
Viva la Vida::Coldplay
Only One::Yellowcard
Love Me for Me::Ashlee Simpson
I'm in Love with a Girl::Gavin DeGraw
Everytime::Britney Spears
Bubble Toes::Jack Johnson
When You're Gone::Avril Lavigne
Alone::Heart
Hanging By a Moment::Lifehouse
The Climb::No Doubt
Chasing Cars::Snow Patrol
My Immortal::Evanescence
You and Me::Lifehouse

Another secret about me::I am a high schooler at heart.
Oh, and::I'm an Ashlee Simpson fan.

There is something very appealing to me about getting in the car, popping this baby in, and just driving. These songs speak to a part of my soul that doesn't get much recognition these days. I am a grown up now after all.

Some of these songs are from my past; some are more recent; all would have served as much needed therapy for my overactive teenage heart.

I made this mix for a friend of mine, but the truth...it's for me too.
Anyone want a copy?

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